DOSE: T+ 0:00	40 mg	insufflated	Noopept	(powder / crystals)
T+ 0:00	.25 g	smoked	Cannabis
T+ 0:00	600 mg	oral	Tyrosine
T+ 0:00	repeated	oral	Alcohol - Hard
T+ 0:00	repeated	oral	Vitamins / Supplements
T+ 1:00	23 mg	insufflated	3-MeO-PCP	(powder / crystals)
T+ 2:30	1 hit		25C-NBOMe	(blotter / tab)

BODY WEIGHT:

155 lb

3-meo-PCP :: Reality is the Final Arbiter

Dose:
Insufflated 3-MeO-PCP ~23 mg.

Enhancers/Supplements:
Insufflated Noopept ~40mg.
Sublingual 25c-nbome ~700ug
Smoked Marijuana ~.25g
Oral Alcohol ~ half shot of 151 every 2 hrs
Oral Magnesium Glycinate 5x400mg
Oral N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine 2x300mg
Oral 5-HTP 1x100mg

Intro:

Over the past few years, I have sampled a panoply of psychoactive substances, and have acquired a penchant for dissociatives, particularly the arylcyclohexylamines. DXM sparked my interest in the realm of NMDA antagonism and prompted me to seek out Ketamine, which provided me with a few interesting experiences. However, I did not enjoy the nausea and disliked the large amount of powder necessary for a proper insufflated experience as I felt weary of using an intramuscular injection. Later, I acquired some MXE which provided me with powerful ego shattering experiences, feelings of rebirth, oneness with the universe, and many of the most intense entheogenic experiences that I find the psychedelic experience lacking in. I obtained the powerful experiences that I sought, yet experienced a degree of psychosis, or as John Lilly called it, 'an undercurrent of dissociation', which affected my belief systems. John Lilly thought he was communicating with extraterrestrials, and though he considered the possibility that he was in fact interacting with his subconscious, he ultimately wrote in 'The Scientist' that he considered both of these descriptions equivalent and left it up to the reader to decide which one was better. I would disagree with this premise, as according to Bayesian reasoning, one should penalize a hypothesis for added levels of complexity. That is, while it is certainly possible that aliens figure out a way to communicate with me under the influence of dissociatives, it is nonetheless much more probable that a drug interacts with the chemical makeup of the brain making me aware of a vast subconscious that holds key insights that are normally shielded from waking consciousness.

Currently, I best prefer view these 'voices' as Isomorphic Algorithms from the Tron Legacy's Grid. The mind is one extremely vast structure, and while I assumed that I was always one person controlling the body, I actually consist of the sum of many different minds, personalities, and egos competing and interacting for control of the body in various different situations. I do not create these personalities, they are already there, though sometimes hidden, and with a nature that is inexplicably bizarre and alien to a very human identity that I feel so often entrenched in.

The Experience:

8 pm - My close friend, knowing my immense appreciation for dissociatives, invited me to sample as he called it, 'the last remaining easily accessible 3-MeO-PCP in the world' - a drug he acquired recently. Having wanting to try this drug for many months, I now felt excitement now that I finally had the opportunity to try it! The substance was a fine white powder, and I was told it was of 99% purity. The NMR spectroscopy peak indicated that this was the more potent Hydrochloride salt of the PCP. We begin by dosing the supplements that are listed at the end of the report along with the reasons we took them.

9 pm – Our bodies have started to absorb the supplements, and we decide to dose the 3-MeO-PCP. I meticulously cut our lines, taking around 10 times longer than I would for MXE, out of a sense of appreciation to properly snort a drug that I had waited to try for so long. When I railed the powder through my right nostril, I felt a sense of pain accompanied by numbness. It was nowhere as painless as cocaine, nor as numbing as MXE. It was a sense of discomfort that faded away after a few minutes, even though irritation to the nasal membrane remained for the day after. Even though the effects of dissociatives take a while to manifest, the initial feel of the drug starts to show itself within just a few minutes. Immediately I could tell this was something far far different from MXE, though of a similar nature.

The Arylcyclohexylamines posses actions as anesthetic agents, yet they also have powerful dopaminergic effects, u-opiate agonism, sigma agonism, and some of them have an effect on the serotonin transporter. They ignite all the reward systems in the brain. There really is nothing else like this 'Cyclomania' as I like to call it. Although LSD comes close with its broad spectrum dopamine receptor activation, the 'Cyclomania' makes me feel unstoppable. It will make me feel more powerful than a massive quantity of meth. It offers an opiated feeling reminiscent of dropping a few vicodins, a relaxation that adds to the stimulation. And if a speedball wasn't enough, the sigma agonism, NMDA antagonism, and other effects only add to the cyclomania. While stimulants make my thoughts go faster, I get the feeling that a stimulated consciousness prefers a breadth-first search at the expense of a depth first search. They sacrifice creativity at the expense of processing speed. I feel that the 3-meo-PCP preserves the intensity of my intelligence. I can probe ideas deeply and broadly like with LSD. However, while psychedelics enhance consciousness by turning up the signal, dissociatives enhance thinking by dialing down the noise. Two paths converge to the same destination.

I have not come across any other drugs that rival the recreational aspect of the Cyclomania. Limitations are obliterated. I run around. I punch the air. I tap my cheek and my fingers. I grin. I spin around frantically. I feel so hyper. I raise my hands up in the air as though I am Atlas lifting the Earth. The cyclomania is in effect, and now the dissociative effects are starting to manifest. It would be very easy to let this get to my head and start to think of myself as a superior person rather than just someone else on a drug. Yet, my past abuse of stimulants has made me humble. Curiosity is a better motivator than pride. I do not take arylcyclohexylamines for pleasure, or for enhancement of cognition, or for personal guidance in my endeavours, even though all these benefits occurred during this particular experience. I take them to obliterate my ignorance, to understand, and to face annihilation with the intention that a more perfect being will emerge from the disintegration.

9:45 pm - Unlike MXE, 3-meo-PCP offers significantly more executive control. At this dose, I felt comparably dissociated to a sublingual 100mg MXE dose, yet was able to coordinate my physical movements. I could walk normally instead of using the discombobulated gait that I would usually resort to on MXE or DXM. I could converse, though with less proficiency. I could listen to and process simple sentences. I like that I can operate my body. At this dose, the 3-meo-PCP does not deactivate my body while my mind is elsewhere. I can move, I just choose not to. I prefer this sensation of being elsewhere, yet still present in my body. It is a very here-but-not-here feeling. Unlike MXE, 3-meo-PCP feels 'cold'. It lacks the warmth of the experience, probably due to a lesser effect on opiate receptors. A user once described 3-meo-PCP as 'Clinical' in its effects, and I completely agree. MXE eases me over with its warmth. It is a psychedelic heroin, like ketamine, enabling me to descend into a warm pool of infinite ideas over and over. An experienced Arylcyclohexylamine chemist once said that he considered 3-meo-PCP to posses a light opiate action. I wonder if I would prefer plain PCP more, as arylcyclohexylamines with opiate agonism likely detract from the terrifying nature of the experience. Why would I want to feel terrified? Because dissociation is terrifying. If something is scary, I want to feel scared. If something is ridiculous, I want to laugh. I want my emotions to map accurately to the reality because this indicates the integrity of my model. MXE offers terrifying vistas, yet I do not feel terrified of anything, and feel lost in a dreamlike opiated half-conscious state. In this way, I find 3-meo-pcp more honest, because I retain my sense of discrimination for emotional qualia. Like people, some drugs are more honest than others.

10:30 pm - The dissociation is in effect. I feel very lucid in the hot tub as I drop 1 tab of 25c-nbome. The stars are beautiful. My sense of time begins to disintegrate in the fashion characteristic of dissociatives. I see many timelines. Diverging in dimensions greater than time. Timelines are orthogonal to each other. I perceive many worlds. Every instant of time, a new world is created for every time we perceive a decision. What we perceive as choice is a split between two timelines orthogonal to each other. The universe is far far vaster than it seems, even accounting for the immense emptiness of space. There are many possibilities, many worlds. As I got out of the hot tub, I felt numb to the cold air around me, and did not opt for a towel to dry off. I could navigate perfectly in the darkness and did not bump into any obstacles as my mind moved my body from one location in space to another. I prefer the darkness on dissociatives. The mind fills in the gaps where there exists no perception. The room I was in turned into a planetarium and I floated bodiless in space.

11:00 am - As my awareness begins to take shape, I found that I could turn myself any size and eidetically visualize the solar system as well as traverse large interplanetary distances. I gently offer suggestions to my brain which lead to proprioceptive distortions transforming my body to supra-planetary size. As I approach the speed of light, my subjective sense of time relativistically contracts with respect to the time scale of the universe, and I traverse intergalactic distances in seconds. I have studied a little astronomy and use my knowledge of the stars to navigate my imagination of the universe. The universe appears lucid in my mind's eye. This experience is breathtaking as I zoom into the Andromeda galaxy, millions of light years away. I lose myself in thoughts of the potential forms of alien life. My visualizations are spectacular.

Normally, my brain lacks enough dopaminergic action to eidetically visualize objects, rotate them, expand them, and interact with them in the realm of the mind. If I try to work with numbers, or remember shapes, they just ... slip away, much to my frustration. This block does not disappear without massive dopaminergic assistance. Meditation only helps slightly at my current level of expertise. The only drugs that I have found that bring back a high level of eidetic visualization capability are methamphetamine, arylcyclohexylamines, lsd, and salvia (which acts as a potent D2 receptor agonist). The 25c-nbome has started to effect me, and the shapes that would normally occur when I close my eyes take on fractal overtones. I would have preferred to take less 25c, just for a slight 5ht2a agonism as my current dose interferes with the stark lucidity of this dissociative experience. The linearity of my thoughts is disrupted. I notice some shape distortion. I smoke some marijuana to combat the nausea of the 25c-nbome and put on a strobe light. Wow. My emotions vary with respect to the frequency of the strobe. A slow strobe will build anticipation while a faster frequency will induce anxiety. The strobe light offers a hypnotic experience. I practice blowing smoke rings in the strobe light and appreciate how they appear to move in quantized leaps through space.

12:00 am - I am at the peak of the experience. The cyclomania is rampant, yet my movements are normal. Just because I have all the energy in the world does not mean that I have to use it. Or more humorously, as Kal Penn says in 'Harold and Kumar go to White Castle', “Just because you're hung like a moose doesn't mean you have to do porn!' This drug feels very unnerving. It is the only time a dissociative has made me feel scared. I feel not only alone, but separate from myself. I feel very very far away. I feel fortunate that I am with close friends and tell them that I feel very happy that I am with them and that I enjoy their company. Objects seem separate from themselves. Objects around me do not appear to be what they are even though I know what they are. They feel like shells. When I look at a knife, I know what it is, what it is used for, and how to use it, but it does not seem like it is a knife. The labels seem separate from the identity of the object.

When I think about it after the experience, this state of consciousness maps to what the sage Patanjali called 'Sabda-Artha-Samadhi' in the Yoga Sutras, or to transliterate 'Word-meaning-concentration-state'. This is a incipient state of trance-consciousness that occurs on the way to Enlightenment in which the mind comes to better understand objects by deconstructing them and learning that the label of an object is in fact distinct from the meaning of an object. The meaning is given from the function of an object which determines the form. I think when writing this report, that my psychological distress came from having the map-territory relation shown to me in such a direct manner. The model in my mind from data obtained through the senses is not the object - it is a model. I get a feeling for why when Dr. Manhattan in 'The Watchmen' is shown looking at a pink bra, Silk Sceptre gets the sense that he doesn't really know what objects are, and doesn't particularly care. I can pick up a knife, but what I perceive is not the knife. A knife is what a knife does. John Lilly said that injunctive knowledge is the only real knowledge. I can understand why he said that. In coming to grips with the chaos in the depths of the mind, the only real thing is action. Thoughts and ideas are have no substance until we choose to manifest them. Descriptions convey no useful information.

6:00 am - It has been several hours and the PCP is still going strong. I'm drinking water to pee it out, but forced diuresis does not do that much. Only 10 percent of PCP is excreted through urine, the liver, colon, and sweat eliminate the rest. Hunter S. Thompson was once said that PCP was the one drug that he would not do again because it lasted so fucking long. 3-meo-PCP has a 24 hour half-life. 3-meo-PCP will *fuck you up*. After 72 hours since the experience, I *still* feel the Cyclomania. Most of the drug has been excreted, and now I feel permeated by a wonderful afterglow. In contrast to the scary dissociation experienced at the beginning. The re-emergence phenomena are absolutely wonderful. Unlike MXE, I find that 3-meo-PCP does not 'Kill the Music' as I phrased it once. It keeps my emotions intact instead of removing them. I feel love for my friends and the music permeates me. The dissociative experience resembles meditation. There exists no point in deconstructing the mind, if you cannot reconstruct it to be simpler, elegant, and more beautiful. As a computer programmer whom I respect once stated, 'To add is nothing. To add what is already there is less than nothing. To subtract and be left with the same is more. To subtract and be left with more is a true achievement.' While Psychedelics and other experiences compel us to seek out greater levels of novelty and complexity in our experiences. I feel that sometimes, the mind requires simplification. Dissociatives allow me to come to an understanding of fundamental things enabling my mind to function faster and more accurately because simple models are better models.

11 :00 am - I do not sleep. The next day I proceed to workout. I am amped and energetic comparable to a high dose of methamphetamine, yet, my heart is not pounding in my chest. I feel overjoyed. I feel maniac on the afterglow. Since rhabdomylosis can occur if we actually decide to use PCP super-strength, I deliberately decided to baby the workout and use lower weights on bench press and squats, while doing bodyweight core exercises and pullups. This was really fun. I feel reborn during the re-emergence phenomena. During my MXE-psychosis, I perceived a range of synchronicities which convinced me that the voices had power to control aspects of my life. John Lilly called these entities ECCO or the 'Earth Coincidence Control Office'. These synchronicities were so convincing, that I felt compelled to give the voices great power over my belief systems. Arylcyclohexylamines cause all the symptoms of schizophrenia, from the mania, to the depression, to hearing voices, as well as promoting other psychotic behaviour.

Yet, unlike tranquillizing anti-psychotic drugs, Arylcyclohexylamines are ... interesting. Someone once asked the talented, yet schizophrenic mathematician John Forbes Nash why he believed in all that bullshit (Aliens, conspiracies, etc.). He replied that the the insane and bizarre ideas came from the same source that his brilliant mathematical epiphanies came from. The only thing that distinguishes Genius from insanity is results. A genius can come up with unexpected and bizarre ideas that map accurately to reality. An insane person comes up with ideas that have contradictions and no practical application. During this experience I proved to myself that the voices were fallible. I realized that Reality is the final arbiter, as all our beliefs, crazy or not, must remain testable. It is equally stupid to reject a testable crazy hypothesis as to hold a crazy untestable hypothesis. Type 1 and Type 2 errors during rational thinking ... I want to strive for empiricism in my life.

3:00 pm – I am writing this report, now, filling in my thoughts on the mindsets I had at particular points during the experience, which is rather challenging since my consciousness was rather discombobulated during the past 18 hours.... I think that MXE is a strip-tease compared to 3-MeO-PCP. This is certainly a hard drug, yet I find it is less abusable than MXE. It lasts so fucking long, that I wouldn't want to dose it frequently at all. My friends who had tolerance to the drug, felt tired on the days after, but for me, the mania lasted for days. I also find it extremely desirable that it has less opiate action. While opiates make me feel warm, they absolutely detract from the sharpness of my emotions. Opiates make me feel warm, not happy. They deactivate emotions and I feel neither happy nor sad, but indifferent. The lucidity of this experience was startling. I would consider trying more next time, but think that arylcyclohexylamines deserve to be treated with the same respect as MDMA.

Shulgin once said that MDMA would lose its unique feel if taken more than 4 times a year. I absolutely think that this advice applies to arylcyclohexylamines. They are really powerful and need to be used sparingly for maximum benefit. Different drugs are addictive in different ways. Opiates are addictive for people who have felt pain and hurt in the past, because indifference feels superior to suffering. Stimulants are addictive towards people who feel insignificant, weak, and unable to manifest their volition. Arylcyclohexylamines are addictive the same way the Internet is addictive. They open a world where there exists no difference between the idea and the manifestation of the idea. As John Lilly said, 'In the province of the mind, there are no limits.' Yet, it would be ridiculous to say that the Internet should not be used. Dissociatives are like chainsaws; power tools must be used responsibly. To best use them, I feel that it is crucial to both use dissociatives and apply what we learn in the real world. It is very easy to lose oneself in intellectual masturbation.

24+ hrs : I have come to peace with the voices inside my head. Prior to this experience I used to hold their insights as infallible, yet I have come to see my brain's accepting of their omnipotence as a failed instance of pattern matching software. Various patterns exist, yet I now find it irrational to see agency in coincidental occurrences. For example, if I were walking on the sidewalk, and the other person wanted to walk past me, imagine that the other person started walking the other way. If we each changed direction 8 times, then there would be a 1/(2^16) probability that this scenario would happen. Which probably happens to very many people in the world, yet would appear exceedingly unnerving convincing that supernatural forces are at work if it happened in a drug induced suggestible psychotic mindset. The voices obey you because they are you. As Terence McKenna once advised, ask them to teach you what they know. If they obey, and give you the truth, rejoice, as your subconscious mind has been your ally. If they refuse and antagonize you with lies, test them, and stop listening to the ones that have betrayed your trust. You have to take control and make the voices your servants. Constantly testing my ideas and updating my beliefs based on the results has given me a great peace of mind with respect to the insanity and unexpected quirks of my intelligence.

3+ months: PCP is a class drug - a serendipity of molecular perfection. I have tried a great many different drugs, and 3-meo-PCP is my absolute favourite. I think back to Steve-O's documentary 'PCP saved my life' and laugh. This was a glowing experience that has changed me for the better. I decided to wait a few months after the trip to see that my mindset was affected just temporarily, but the insights and happiness seems to have lasted. Neither MDMA nor psychedelics ever brought me any lasting joy. I always felt like a good person on MDMA and superior and psychedelics, and once the drug wore off, I would revert to my deficits in my habits and actions. I appreciate the power and intensity of dissociatives. I love and respect molecules from this class of drugs, and while I have felt an urge to redose the 3-meo-PCP, I feel that it would be unwise to do so until I have grown as a person, and the dissociation will yield new insights. I have immense respect and appreciation for PCP and intend to use it wisely so my experiences will bring me joy and wisdom.

Epilogue:

Arylcyclohexylamines are dangerous. They certainly feel far far safer than MDMA, a commonly abused drug, which from personal experience I feel is significantly more neurotoxic than methamphetamine, though I will not go into my reasons here for sake of brevity. Certainly supplements can reduce many of the harms, as well as consuming food and water, as well as not doing anything stupid like driving or swimming under the influence. However, it is impossible to attain success by simply avoiding danger. Risk is an inevitable factor of any potentially fruitful research venture. Once on a large dose of very pure MXE, my friend and I decided to run up and down some mountains near his house for 10 miles. My knee was hurting from a cycling injury, yet I decided to push on. My body finally forced me to stop, and I walked the last mile back. When I got back and rested, I could not walk for 3 days. My knee collapsed on me if I tried. This injury took months to heal, with rehabilitation, supplements, and nutrition. As my friend has quipped after this, 'Gattaca rules do not apply on Arylcyclohexylamines'. I have also injured up my lower back, elbow, hit my head, scarred my hands, shins, acquired chemical burns, and have likely sustained other damage internally that is not so obviously visible. It is most dangerous to take ridiculously high doses of arylcyclohexylamines which leave the mind dissociated but the body functional. For the strongest experience, I would wager that ketamine is safest because it prevents the body from acting without guiding directions from the mind.

Despite my past drug abuse, I feel that the majority of my intelligence and learning capacity remains intact, and that other drugs have damaged it more than dissociatives have. Shulgin felt that ketamine was an anaesthetic and preferred psychedelics because he liked the feeling of 'being here' instead of dissociated. I prefer to see dissociatives as power tools for power users. It is difficult to injure oneself so easily with psychedelics. However, I find that dissociatives offer the most bizarre, interesting, pleasurable, useful, and transformative experiences possible through drugs. I would advise anyone who experiments with them to use them sparingly, use supplements, and apply the lessons learned for maximum benefit. Supplementation details included below.

Additional Data:

We also dosed various other supplements that have beneficial effects on the high. Noopept acts to increase recall and bring back more of the dissociative experience, as some of the most alien and remarkable thoughts on the nature of existence tend to escape memory. We also took 5-HTP, a serotonin precursor, as I have found that taking it with MXE takes some of the edge off the alienating dissociative experience. We took 25-c-nbome as a 5h2a agonist as such drugs were found to reduce the toxicity of arylcyclohexylamine dissociatives in one clinical study. We also took N-acetyl-L-Tyrosine as a dopamine precursor, to enhance the stimulant effects caused by the Dopamine re-uptake properties of the 3-meo-PCP. In addition, we also took small amounts of alcohol throughout the experience as I find the GABA-ergic properties of ethanol act favourably in conjunction with dissociatives. Ideally, I would have preferred to take a low dose of lorazepam, or another long lasting benzodiazepine, as it would avoid the need to redose and reduce the load on the liver from the 3-meo-PCP. However, I thought it better to have the GABA-ergic action than omit it.

Finally, we took Magnesium glycinate throughout the experience, a significantly more bioavailable form of the more common Magnesium oxide. Magnesium has the role of normally blocking the NMDA receptor, preventing the flow of calcium ions when the receptor is closed. This is incidentally the same site where most dissociatives bind, acting as a channel blocker, preventing the flow of calcium ions. I have found 3 experiential benefits when using Magnesium in conjunction with dissociatives. Firstly, a characteristic buzzing noise, such as that experienced on nitrous is nonexistent. I feel as though this sound is correlated with neurotoxicity, though I have no way of proving this. This sound feels uncomfortable, like my brain is being torn. Secondly, binocular vision is preserved. When using MXE daily in the past, I used to joke that 'You know you're a dissociophile when you can see better with one eye than you can with two'. However, this time I had perfect binocular vision and could retain my awareness of depth. Finally, the Magnesium acts as a buffer for the dissociative experience. If I take a high dose of dissociatives without supplemental magnesium, I will start to feel dissociated and then suddenly find myself regaining consciousness in a heavily dissociated state. However, with supplemental magnesium, I retain awareness as I gradually sink deeper into the dissociated realm. In this aspect, I would say that Magnesium acts as a buffer for consciousness, enabling greater control and appreciation over the experience by preventing overly rapid shifts in mental state. I hypothesize that this may have something to do with the magnesium ions competing with the drug for the receptor binding site, thus decreasing the rate at which the NMDA receptor reaches peak inhibition levels.

Final Words:

I have done my best to write this report to the best of my descriptive capacity, even though mere words cannot convey the magnitude of the experience. Much to my regret, I have found no trip reports of my favourite drug. I sincerely hope that I can provide much needed qualitative information on an arylcyclohexylamine that is feared, shunned, and condemned not only by society but also by serious psychonauts.

Exp Year: 2013	ExpID: 102369
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: Sep 3, 2015	Views: 5,522
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3-MeO-PCP (558), 25C-NBOMe (540) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Retrospective / Summary (11), Combinations (3)