DOSE:

5 hits

oral

LSD

(blotter / tab)

BODY WEIGHT:

108 lb

It was a Friday night at 3am - my boyfriend and I watched as our friends walked out the door and decided what to do with the rest of our evening. We had been casually drinking and consumed some MDMA earlier, but wanted the energy to stay up and enjoy each other's company. Yes, LSD is a lovely idea. He cut a generous chunk of blotter in half - we figured splitting a 10 strip would make for a dazzling sunrise. Before placing it in my mouth, I asked him if he wanted to set an intention for the trip. He said, 'I'll leave this one up to you.' I gave it a thought and responded, 'Remember the sex we had when we first met? That ethereal element that transcended body sensation? I want to rediscover that higher intimacy, or see if we can.'

So he took a shower and I relaxed in bed on the come-up. I noticed my visuals already becoming incredibly intense while we enjoyed each other's bodies in our bed - about 40 minutes after we dosed I had noticed that the act of coitus was almost too intense and took a break. Taking a moment to look at my surroundings made me realize that my visuals/sensory perception was beyond my comfort level (something that has never happened to me - I've always loved LSD and tend to take thorough doses with no issue).

Slightly, I panic. I mention to my boyfriend that I'd really like some xanax, because I was caught off guard. Of course, we don't have any. We go downstairs and as he tried to call a friend for some, I become increasingly ambushed with sensation. I am in a cold sweat, unsure if my mind will be able to stay present enough to stay...me - because I knew it was only going to build for another 2 hours until I really peaked. All I could think was 'No. No. The only way to handle this is Xanax. I can't withstand this level of sensory fuckery'. I pace over to the bathroom, and turn the light on - BAM! What I see hits me like a wall, I feel my heart pound. Brightness beyond imagination. The sink and toilet had no edges, but looked like pillowy block-forms. My visuals were so outrageous that objects no longer had definition. I turned the light off immediately and began to feel panicked and took my glasses off because my eyes couldn't handle clear vision - never was I so thankful to be half-blind.

My boyfriend, unable to hunt down xanax from a friend, started doing what he does best, keeping people calm in anxious situations. He took me up to bed to relax - I keep asking, 'am I going to lose my mind?', 'am I going to be normal after having this experience?'. He reassured me that I was going to be fine, over and over. I was hanging on moment by moment, reminding myself that it was just LSD, that it was intense, but that I wasn't losing my mind. He kept me as relaxed as possible and present.

Then, things got surreal. As the morning light began to trickle into the window, I realized that I was unable to keep my eyes open - my pupils were too dilated to handle light. The next hour and I half of my trip would consist of my face being buried in a pillow, reaching levels of sensory perception that I never thought were possible, and the loss of my physical form. I started describing what I was experiencing to my boyfriend - I could see and feel . . . everything. I had complete synesthesia. Every sensory input I could experience through every sense. Simultaneously I was tasting, hearing, feeling, seeing, and smelling the entirety of the universe. I lost almost all physical perception of my body - I knew it was there, but could only feel vibrations. My boyfriend said, 'it sounds like your third eye is opened way up.' And he was right - I was perceiving things beyond my immediate surroundings - and I realized that I was in a state of awareness that I never thought I would be able to achieve - this is what enlightenment must feel like. What I did know to be helpful in overactive upper chakras is grounding. I wanted to get back into my physical body.

What a better way to ground than uniting two bodies? I decide sex would be an excellent distraction. Suddenly, my overwhelming sensory ability went from an anxiety-inducing phenomenon to the most beautiful gift I've ever experienced. The physical sensation of coitus exploded into sustained spiritual bliss - all of the physical and emotional pleasure I've ever felt couldn't add up to the level of euphoric sensation I was attaining. For a half hour I was in a state of sustained, inconceivable orgasm. It felt like our souls were merging, a ethereal body one in the same. Tears streamed down my face as I tried to iterate the visions I saw projected on my closed eyelids 'I've never seen such beauty. Colors and sights I've never known. It's beautiful.'

He leaned over and asked me, 'Do you remember what your intention was?'. And I began to laugh. Ethereal, beyond comprehension spiritual intimacy IS what I was going for. Despite the anxiety, uneasiness, panic, and disorientation I had to experience for what felt like 12 hours, it was incredibly ironic that it would, indeed, lead to the fruition of my intention - and on a level I never thought possible.

It's absolutely ironic how the universe can manifest one's intentions.

After this, I was finally done peaking, and in a calm state. Not too long after I regained the ability to open my eyes. For the next 8 hours I still wasn't able to put my glasses on because the visuals were too intense. It wasn't until 19 hours after I dosed that I was able to fall asleep.

My boyfriend and I decided that the blotter we had was dosed way too generously. I'm just so thankful that despite tripping the hardest he ever had, he was still with it enough to keep me from going into LSD panic shitshow.

Moral of the story: LSD is some intense shit. Dose wisely.

Exp Year: 2014	ExpID: 104280
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: Jun 16, 2020	Views: 1,594
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