DOSE: T+ 0:00	20 mg	oral	2C-B
T+ 2:00		oral	MDMA
T+ 0:00		smoked	Cannabis
T+ 0:00		inhaled	Nitrous Oxide

BODY WEIGHT:

120 lb

This was my first time taking 2C-B, the only hallucinogen I'd taken before being Salvia, which I knew would not prepare me for this! MDMA is usually my drug of choice on a night out, and I'd never combined it with anything else before.

The setting: A psytrance night, with my sister and friend. We arrived to find the main room was actually a covered area outdoors, which was fantastic as the cold air was really stimulating and it didn't get claustrophobic or overheated. I took my 2C-B when we arrived at midnight. I started to come up slowly and gently, the first thing I noticed was bursts of hyperactive energy alternating with pleasant, mellow, floaty feelings. These were both familiar to me from different stages of a roll, though I had yet to take any MDMA.

I waited what I assumed to be two hours or so and then took around 100mg MDMA. Excited to see what would happen, I kept dancing and losing myself in the music, feeling both energetic and contented. For the next half hour or so my movements while dancing seemed to become more and more fluid, and I started to melt pleasantly into the music.

Then it started to kick in...
The first hallucination I experienced was auditory. A new element was introduced into the music and it morphed into the sound of cheering. It was like a distant rumble, as though everyone in the club was shouting but I was somehow far away so the sound was gentle. It sounded like a gig, or a football crowd, but it was definitely a joyous cheering, not a jeer. It seemed to come closer and then recede, as though in waves. At first I just assumed people were cheering, but when I looked around nobody was, and when I shook my head the sound went away.

This happened a couple more times- whenever a certain element came into the music it would often grow until it reached a crescendo of cheering, which felt as though it was getting closer to me, surrounding me and then as it reached me, it quickly faded. This sounds quite claustrophobic and frightening now that I'm writing it down, but at the time it wasn't. If anything, it was comforting. It was enveloping and embracing me.

At some point in all this I meandered and danced my way to the bar for a glass of water with ice. I drank some water and accidentally swallowed a couple of large ice cubes. The ice in my throat felt enormous and somehow vibrant. Even colder, sharper, and more alarming that I would have expected ice to feel. I experienced a very physical tingling sensation from my throat. If it could be visualised, I would say it felt as though there were circles emanating from my throat, starting small and growing to cover my whole body, which began to tingle pleasurably. The music seemed to be vibrating in my throat where the ice was, as though that was the source of the sound.

On MDMA, I often find a change of atmosphere or temperature helps me to come up quickly. The cold water and the ice definitely brought me up, hard and fast.

I had been dancing in pretty much the same spot up until this point, so I decided to work my way around the dance floor, see the room from different viewpoints and interact with new people. I felt very affectionate towards everyone, and had the familiar MDMA-induced sense of everyone in the room being connected, embracing one another metaphorically. I moved around, dancing with different people, enjoying and sharing the energies of each individual I interacted with. When I got to the front of the room, where people were tightly packed and the lights and colours were more intense, I stopped in front of the DJs to dance for a while. When I waved my arms in front of me, I had my first visual hallucination. The images of my moving hands had tracers, as though I was watching time lapse photography or one of those little 'flip books' that you flick through and the pictures move in an almost smooth, slightly jerky fashion. I saw the DJs had their hands in the air too, and all of a sudden hands seemed to be everywhere. My hands merged with everyone else's, I was embracing everyone in the crowd and I was a tiny dot in a sea of hands and faces and bodies and emotion and that was a beautiful, comforting thing.

When I got back to my sister and friend, wearing my 'I don't know what's happening to me but it's pretty fucking special' expression, we shared a small joint. A couple of puffs brought me up higher, impossibly quickly. I closed my eyes and fell straight into the centre of... something. I folded inwards, I had a sense of falling into a large circular hole. This was comparable to something I have experienced quite often tripping on Salvia, but unlike the Salvia, this was very mind-focused. Salvia for me is always a very physical sensation of spinning, swaying or falling, followed by a struggle to get back to the surface, peeling away layers of consciousness until I reach reality again. There is usually a moment of panic and a small struggle as I peel back the last couple of layers, wondering if I'll ever get back or if between these layers is where I have to spend my life now.

Well, 2C-B didn't make me feel like that. I surrendered myself to whatever I was falling into, allowing myself to enjoy the ride and see what would happen, where it would take me. I had lots of these short and very intense 'trips to the centre' during the night. I fell head first into a massive circular black hole and got completely lost somewhere on a new level of consciousness. I experienced little blackouts and short periods of ego death, and then returned to my body with a jolt and a slightly uncomfortable self-consciousness. When I became aware of the present moment again, aware that I was in a club surrounded by people, I was amazed that I was still standing considering how little control I felt I had over my body, and how detached I felt from it physically. My body felt like liquid, I felt as though I could move in strange, fluid ways. I felt serpentine, lightweight and agile.

I could feel the air, not in the way I experience breeze on my skin, but- this is difficult to explain- as though it was happening to my skin. I suppose it was a little like the feeling you get when you move underwater. The air was lapping at my skin, gently and evenly. I couldn't feel my clothes, my skin felt exposed, I felt naked. If I were to imagine how my body looked then, it would have been glowing white and my skin sparkling slightly. My skin tingled and I occasionally felt a current of electricity make its way through my entire body. Occasionally it would stop and try to alter my movements. I noticed this when I tried to walk in a straight line.

To say I lost track of time doesn't quite cover it. I usually lose track of time when I'm listening to good music on MDMA. This was different. Time was no longer linear. It flipped backwards and forwards, usually only a few minutes at a time. I continued to experience the blackouts and short trips, and sometimes I recalled images or messages from them and sometimes I remembered nothing, except that I had been allowed to experience something special.

I danced my way to the toilets at one point, and I think I got a little lost whilst washing my hands. I remember dancing while I was waiting to go into a cubicle. I remember the graffiti on the walls wriggling and shifting slightly. I don't remember making my way back to the dance floor. I asked my sister (who was pretty much sober) 'Did I just go to the toilets?' I genuinely had no idea if I'd left the dance floor or not. I may have imagined it. This frightened me slightly, but more than that it amazed and intrigued me.

We sat down to have another smoke, and just as we did a new track started playing. I don't know what it was, but it just came out of nowhere and it split the air. The sound was pure, crystalline and beautiful. It sounded like ice and diamonds. It was piercing, orgasmic and completely unearthly. I had to stand up and dance. I had a couple more puffs and fell into a world of crystal and ice. I was in an ice palace. Everything was blue and silver, crystal clear and sharp. Everything was ice and water, glittering and swirling.

These hallucinations are hard to explain. As I remember it now, the visuals behind my closed eyes were not that strong. However, I had a very clear sense of being in a particular setting. I suppose it was like when I wake up in the morning but before I open my eyes, and I already have a sense of the space, and where I expect things to be in my familiar room when I open my eyes. I sensed these elements and landscapes around me, sensed that I was in an entirely different setting, and the feelings I had suggested it was nowhere in this world.


We went and sat in the bar area, and there were postcards for a future psytrance night on the table. My friend seemed very excited by the postcards and told me to look closely at them. I did, and right before my eyes the images moved. New lines formed in the image, they became 3 dimensional and the colours and shapes undulated. A symmetrical figure appeared behind some of the shapes and blinked its eyes, moved out towards my eyes and retreated back into the surface. It was geometric and sort of Aztec looking. This was my first experience of actually seeing something that I knew 'wasn't really there.' This was the first time something happened to me that fitted neatly into my previous idea of what hallucinations were: seeing something that wasn't really there. I was aware that I was hallucinating at this point, in a way that I wasn't when I was falling into new worlds on the dance floor. At no point did I think that the postcard was actually moving. I thought how amazing it was that it appeared to be moving, right before my eyes, when I knew it wasn't really. I was amused.

Back outside, we danced some more and I felt mellow, contented and unaware of any particular sensation on my body. I noticed some of the psychedelic patterns on the walls were undulating, and I lost myself in the music for a while. At some indeterminable point, the music stopped outdoors and everyone made their way inside, where the psytrance DJs continued. I was snapped out of my reverie, I kept asking my sister what was happening, and allowed myself to be shepherded back indoors. I continued to dance, closing and opening my eyes alternately. My depth perception distorted. I saw the crowd in front of me and the DJ behind that. He seemed to zip further away, as though he was at the end of a tunnel. I felt we were outdoors again because although we were in a relatively small and crowded room, I had a sense of an enormous empty space above and around us, and my skin was still tingling as though I was in pleasant night air.

Shortly after this, my sister called a taxi, which arrived just as the night ended. I felt tired and wanted to lie down but I was apprehensive as I didn't entirely trust myself to interact with reality just yet. However, as we reached the door and went outside it was clear we wouldn't be able to go back in.

The outside world was dull, misty and full of jarring, unpleasant sights and sounds. It was still a little dark, and there were lots of taxis outside the club. We got straight into ours and I tried to sit still and not saying anything to alarm the driver. I needed time to process what had happened, but I knew there was no way I would ever make sense of it!

The radio told us it was morning and it was going to play some soothing tracks to help ease us into the day. This fucked with my mind and I found it offensive. The bland, quiet sounds and the insipid music were horrible. The silence outside the club sounded louder than anything that was happening in there. It almost hurts, it's so uncomfortable. Being in the state I was in, tripping gently with occasional jolts back to reality that lasted a few seconds, somewhere in between, I felt a little trapped. I couldn't surrender to it now I was in the cold and unpleasant outside world, and I was with my friend (also tripping) my sister (almost sober but very tired!) and a taxi driver who I didn't think would be amused if I started rambling about consciousness and trips to other worlds.

The journey home involved a fast drive though a very long, white tunnel. It felt so much like a cruel trick to be in that environment in the state I was in that I had to stop myself from laughing hysterically. In fact, the surreal trippy nature of it was almost comforting after the things I had been experiencing all night. Driving fast through a white tunnel which occasionally branched of in different directions, I felt as though we were journeying to the centre of the earth. I got that sensation again of 'falling into' something. I tried to just sit back and silently enjoy the ride. When we got out of the taxi and into the house, the silence hit me again. I suddenly had no memory of how we got there. I remember it now of course, but this was another example of time playing it's odd little tricks on me. I had no idea how we'd got from the club to the tunnel to the house.

I lay down on the sofa and the room undulated slightly. When I closed my eyes I had a sensation of swaying and tipping gently from side to side.

We did a NOS balloon and I completely left Earth. I was travelling through a series of circles. I don't remember now if they were getting larger or smaller, but suddenly I was at the centre of the universe. There was a quiet explosion and I was dropped back onto the sofa, full of wonder and my whole body pleasantly numb. I was a tiny speck of dust on the face of this enormous Earth, and that was a beautiful and comforting thing.

Summary:
This was not easy to write. I found it frustrating because I know my words can't come close to accurately describing what happened to me, or within me, or around me, that night.

I was totally unprepared for the experiences I had. I had read trip reports by others but this is something so personal, unique and unpredictable. The only way to begin to describe them is to relate them to things we see, hear, feel and taste in everyday life, which is how I have tried to recall and communicate them now. However, in that state of consciousness there is no worldly comparison for anything that occurs.

I would like to experience tripping in a different, more controlled and relaxed environment. After the first few hours of manic energy, my legs started to feel a little wobbly and I didn't trust myself to remain standing during the most intense short trips, so I made an effort to bring myself back from them when I could. There was a struggle between wanting to surrender myself to the trip and having that thread that (sometimes) connected me to reality that I felt I should follow back to check in with the present moment, the people I was with and surrounded by, and my own physical movements.

I would love to experience 2C-B in an environment where I can completely surrender to the trip, go where it takes me and see what I can take away from it. I feel incredibly grateful for the consciousness-expanding, heart- and mind-opening experiences 2C-B gave me. It opened something in me that I hope will never close.

Exp Year: 2015	ExpID: 105946
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 24
Published: Jul 25, 2019	Views: 1,253
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2C-B (52), MDMA (3) : Glowing Experiences (4), Music Discussion (22), Combinations (3), Rave / Dance Event (18)