DOSE:

smoked

DMT

(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

120 lb

I recently went to a music festival and on the last night, at the Flaming Lips' set, a girl I met asked if I'd like to smoke DMT with her and her friends. I told her I was hesitant; what I knew about DMT is that it's incredibly intense. On DMT, people leave reality as we know it, visit other dimensions and meet mystical or divine beings - not something I felt prepared for, let alone at a festival. My new friend assured me it was mild because it was in a joint and that she would be right by my side. I was still nervous and I hadn't ever heard of DMT joints, but I trusted her. I hesitated, then decided what the hell. This was the first time I'd had this opportunity and it could easily be the last.

Her friends passed the joint around and when it came to me, I took a tiny puff. It tasted like spicy incense mixed with something chemical. I felt my body tingle, similar to the beginning of an acid trip. As they continued passing the joint, I took two more hits. As I exhaled the third, I was launched into a different version of reality. For a moment, the world around me seemed to bounce, and then everything turned into fractals. On other psychedelics, I tend to have fewer visuals than other people, but on this drug... wow. All of the people around me, the stage and the sky became complex patterns of colors and shapes. My surroundings looked completely different, but I still recognized them. I felt as though I was seeing the 'true' reality and that 'normal' reality is just a projection of that. I could see people's auras. I looked at my friend and saw that she was more colorful than any of the other people around. She was so beautiful. Her glasses and her eyes were made out of flowers made out of smaller flowers made out of smaller flowers. I felt that if I leaned in closer, I would be able to see the infinitely smaller flowers, but I was afraid of falling into her eyes and not being able to get out.

One of her friends took another hit, and as he exhaled I saw the smoke go directly into my nostrils as if it intended to do so. That second hand smoke sent me to another level for a moment. The fractals became so complex, I didn't recognize what they represented anymore. I wasn't sure where I was and I started to feel disoriented and frightened. The fractals continued becoming more and more intricate, and I became overwhelmed as I realized that my perspective was rapidly zooming out and that I was beginning to see the whole universe at once. Somehow, I was still aware that I had taken a drug and I started to think I shouldn't have. I closed my eyes and the intensity subsided. When I opened them, everything was still fractals, but I was back with my friend at the Flaming Lips show. The Lips began to play 'The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song' and I began to dance.

What an amazing thing it was to dance! I had momentarily left my body and now I was back. I once heard someone (Alan Watts maybe?) say that we are the universe made aware of itself, and that is exactly how I felt. I realized that everything is one, that we are not in the universe, but rather part of it. Everything is atoms and my atoms just so happened, against infinitesimal odds, to arrange themselves into the shape of this body with a brain that gives me consciousness. I was so happy and grateful to be alive, to be the awareness of the universe. I have a body! I can dance! I was completely euphoric, and as I danced, I felt an electric energy move up my spine. My spine turned into a snake that I could feel moving on its own accord. I was confused how this could happen, but it didn't bother me. The snake and I danced together as energy surged up through my body to the top of my head and I tried to sort out what I was. I decided that 'I' was a spiritual being, temporarily inhabiting a physical form, and that my body was the greatest gift I could possibly receive.

At some point, the band played 'Feeling Yourself Disintegrate.' More than once, I've heard this song on acid and laughed out loud at how appropriate it was. When I heard it this time though, it didn't seem funny or coincidental; it seemed like the only possible thing that could happen. If I were ever to smoke DMT, of course Wayne Coyne would be there performing this song live.

The effects wore off gradually. I was no longer seeing everything in fractals, but I continued to see some here and there for the rest of the night.

When I got home from the festival, I couldn't stop thinking about my experience and what it meant. What I smoked was almost certainly changa. I think my brief, overwhelming peak was just a glimpse of what pure DMT is like and I feel convinced now that I probably never want to do that. Also, I'm on zoloft, an SSRI, and it scared me to read that changa contains an MAOI. I'm very grateful that it didn't seem to have any negative effect on me.

Next I got to researching the snake thing. It was so real, I can still recall how it felt. I hardly know anything about chakras, but I vaguely remembered that one of them is represented as a snake, so I googled 'chakras snake.' That led me to the wikipedia article on kundalini, which when I read it, blew my mind. As I read through the article, I realized that kundalini awakening is exactly what happened to me. It feels crazy to think about because I tend to be skeptical of mystical events, but I know without a doubt that's what I experienced. Coincidentally, I had just done some yoga earlier that day for the first time in months; I wonder if that somehow contributed to my kundalini awakening.

I don't generally believe that things happen for a reason, but it feels very much like I was meant to have this experience. I think about the odds that I would meet someone who would offer me this drug, about the second hand smoke I saw go directly into my nose, and about 'Feeling Yourself Disintegrate,' and it just doesn't seem random. I don't really know where to go from there, but the whole thing has inspired me to start meditating again, to get back into yoga, and to explore the more spiritual aspects of yoga

the whole thing has inspired me to start meditating again, to get back into yoga, and to explore the more spiritual aspects of yoga

, since I've previously only done it for the exercise.

Taking such a powerful drug from someone I just met and in public was a big risk, but I'm incredibly grateful that I did.

Exp Year: 2014	ExpID: 106232
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 34
Published: May 22, 2019	Views: 3,689
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DMT (18) : Music Discussion (22), What Was in That? (26), First Times (2), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)