DOSE:

60 mg

oral

Diphenidine

(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

155 lb

Last night at exactly 23:52 I took 60mg of Diphenidine orally. This was my first dissociative experience except for nitrous, but it's atypical so I'm not counting it.

This first part is what I wrote down while under the influence. Second will be written right now, retrospective and sober.

**PART 1**

60mg Diphenidine

Live Report

Feeling very floaty and disconnected. Music is extremely slow. Handstand by Danny Brown is in like 2/4 time. I can't feel my legs and my fingers are very numb. Kind of confused but I can handle it.

Awesome purchase. Introspection is very apparent if there is no music. Typing is oh sooo slowwwwww. Everything is so damn slow. This is crazy. I'm in my body but disconnected. I see the appeal to this class of drugs. There is no brain chatter. It's about being in the moment. I feel very social, although no one is around. Wish I had a friend. [Redacted] or [Redacted] would be sweet.

Kid Cudi is guiding me though this. Drugs you should try it by travis scott. Whoa.

Visuals: Everything is blurry, but in a good way.

Very dreamy. I think this is an OOB experience.

MUSIC IS TOO FUCKING GOOD.

(For some reason I added timestamps later, I don't know why I didn't do it up there ^).

2:48 AM: I have no idea where the bed ends and I begin. I think this is what dissociation is. I'm confused but very happy. Empathy is apparent and shared. Texted group chat. Death Grips is fucking nuts.

2:52 AM: I am floating in my bed. DG is still cool; I just began Jenny Death. Typing is odd. I feel like I'm not making sense but maybe I am.

2:58 AM: Lol I am my bed.

3:24 AM: Wavy as fuck.

**PART 2**

Ok, so, uh, wow. This drug is absolutely crazy in the best way possible. I was nervous going into it as it was my first proper dissociative experience, and I never really grasped how they made people feel because of how hard they seemed to be to explain.

My come up reminded me of how I come up on MDMA. It feels gentle and innocent, but looking back on it I'm absolutely skyrocketing towards the peak. I thought I felt something at around T+0:10, but I'm going to label that placebo after the fact. Around 00:50 (or T+1:00), I actually got a weird tingling in my legs. It felt like some kind of electrical buzzing. Imagine if you could touch a telephone wire without being electrocuted, and instead the electricity just coursed through your body. That's how my legs felt. I noticed I was also typing a lot slower than normal, and triple checked everything for spelling mistakes. I was also becoming slightly more confused as every second passed. Not to where I didn't know what was going on, it was more akin to mundane tasks becoming novel again, as if I'd never done them before. All of this slowly built up until I hit the peak, where things got really, really fun.

I *think* it's around 1:15 at this point. I'm just sitting at my laptop browsing Reddit and kindofnotreally watching Youtube. Typing is very slow at this point, and I'm fucking up words left and right. I make sure to rewrite them, but fuck is that a lot of editing. Part of it is because my fingers are numb, and part of it is because I'm forgetting what I wanted to say halfway through a sentence. Regardless, I'm having the time of my life. My hands are touching the keyboard, I'm sitting down, and I can't tell where one part of my body ends and my chair/laptop begins. It feels as though my laptop, chair, and my body are all one object. I also have this feeling that I'm slowly rotating in my chair, even though I can see I'm sitting perfectly still. It's very relaxing. Just a gentle rocking back and forth feeling.

Around 1:45 now. Still just rocking back and forth, but I notice that music is fucking weird. Every song is extremely slow and it feels like they take forever to finish. I can hear every single detail perfectly. I'm basically listening in slow motion. Day ‘N Nite by Kid Cudi seems to take 30 minutes to finish. I try something faster paced and listen to part of the second half of Old by Danny Brown. It's the more energetic part of the album. He spits over very quick electronic beats. Pretty similar to grime music, if you're from the UK. Even here I keep up no problem. Danny seems to just be talking over the beats. It's almost boring, which I wouldn't even consider a valid criticism sober. Even the chaos that is Death Grips is easy to handle. I can pick out every synth, drum, and layer of sound. Their vocalist sounds as if he's taking a 5 second pause between every word he says (if you don't listen to them, he's actually going out of his fucking mind delivery wise). I listen to all of their newest album, then decide to focus more on how I'm actually feeling.

Physically, I am a noodle. Everything is elastic and loose. My limbs feel heavy, but if I stand up I feel weightless. Quite the contradiction, especially when I'm dissed out of my mind. I get up to go to the bathroom and have to support myself the “entire” way there (like 5 feet, my room is right across from it). I get up and grasp my desk, then wobble over to my door. I feel like a noodle, but my movements are very robotic, calculated. I hang onto it for a second, then kind of catapult myself across the hallway. I run into the bathroom doorframe. I laugh at myself and then turn on the light.

Whoa. I haven't been looking for any visual effects, and I've been in my room with the lights off so I wouldn't notice if any were there anyways. Once I turn the light on though, they really fuck me up. My entire field of vision is…spliced, I guess. It looks like someone took what was in front of me, cut it in a bunch of pieces horizontally, and then kind of stacked one piece on top of the other. It's really hard to explain. It was funny as hell though, and I went into a little bit of a giggle fit. I sit down to pee, because I was pretty sure I would fall over if I tried to stand and do it. Getting up is a project again, but I manage and stumble back into my room. Even with the lights off, the visuals persist now.

There was also an unexpected, but definitely not unwelcome empathogenic aspect to this stuff. It isn't like MDMA in that it's total and utter compassion. It also isn't exactly like alcohol, which I guess is just more carefree-ness than actual empathy. It's kind of a mix of the two. I want to tell people how I feel about them, but I tell them in a very blunt (bordering on aggressive) way. I enjoy the feeling though, and assume that worst case scenario my friends simply disregard what I said.

At this point I'm wanting to call it a night. It's 3:30 in the morning, and I'm ready for sleep. I vibrate over to my bed and get under the blankets. I melt into it and lose my physical boundaries again. I feel like I'm in space or some shit. I have a somewhat difficult time falling asleep, but I wasn't awake past 4:30.

This morning, I have a fantastic afterglow. I'm assuming this is what a DXM afterglow is like. I'm bouncy, happy and social. Just a generally positive mindset. I feel like I hit the reset button on my brain, similar to how some people feel after a good psychedelic trip. I never got that feeling from psychs, but it is unavoidable here. It might almost be better than my MDMA afterglows, and that is saying something because MDMA is my #1 drug. Diphenidine is now easily sitting at #2 though, and it's close.

If you've read this whole thing, thanks. I'm not the most entertaining writer I know, but I A) enjoy it and B) feel obligated to share my experience since this is a new RC.

TL;DR: I listened to music in slow motion while feeling like angel hair pasta and ran into a doorframe at one point. Absolutely a 10/10 experience, and I can't wait to repeat it.

Exp Year: 2015	ExpID: 106449
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Sep 10, 2015	Views: 6,399
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Diphenidine (630) : General (1), First Times (2), Glowing Experiences (4), Alone (16)