DOSE:

4.5 g

oral

Mushrooms

(dried)

BODY WEIGHT:

54 kg

The humble mushroom has always interested me. Having previous psychedelic experiences with mushrooms, and the season being in full swing, I ventured out in search of the magical fungi. I am a small build 15 year old female and have taken small doses of 0.5-1.5g of dried mushrooms, upwards to 3g.

Following a week of rain, I discovered an untouched patch of golden tops around the corner from my house. After picking and drying these specimens I was left with 10g of dried mushrooms. After a week of storing them in a glass jar, I ate 2g and tripped in my room. The experience left me with an odd and unsettling vibe, seeing as I had things to do and was not able to properly enjoy the trip. My mind was solely focused on the tasks I had yet to finish.

A few days later I agreed to trip at the beach with a close friend. I split the mushrooms between us. I diced up 4.5g of the dried mushrooms and ate them in a peanut butter sandwich. I then proceeded to walk to the station with the remainder of the dried mushrooms in a ziplock baggie, to catch a train to meet my friend. The journey in total was around an hour, and seeing I had fasted for 12 hours beforehand, it did not take very long before I started to feel the effects.

On the train to the beach I felt an uneasy and heavy feeling in my stomach. The text on my phone and on the sign across from me on the train begun to subtlety warp. I closed my eyes and laid back in my seat, headphones in. Patterns of kaleidoscope and colour were overlaying my vision once I had closed my eyes. The music playing was rich and deep, it felt as if it pulsed from one ear to another- rippling through my brain. I was not focused on many of the vocals in songs, but more the different tones and beat playing in the background. In my mind, the music was being painted in colours. I picked up on certain sounds that I had not acknowledged when had I listened to the song in my sober state.

As the train came to a stop, I stumbled off and walked to the small bridge built over the tracks. I looked down over the bridge at the train passing beneath me. It was if the tracks beneath me were moving further and further way from me, as if the bridge was extending upwards towards the sky- or the tracks were sinking down further into the earth.

Looking out from the bridge to the sea, everything began moving. It was like that of a dream, the entire scenery was warping and breathing, colours fading into each other and objects bending on angles. As the music continued to play, everything around me appeared to be moving in time with it. I felt in sync with both the notes and my surroundings. Suddenly the uplifting tune being absorbed through my ears was replaced with ringing- I answered the phone call and peered across the bridge to find my friend waving at me. She ran over and embraced me in a hug, and laughing at the size of my pupils that had engulfed my light blue eyes. I handed her the plastic baggie and watched her wolf down the remainder of the mushrooms, laughing hysterically as she did. I She particularly hates mushrooms and I did not even stop to think of making her a sandwich. I cried in amusement as she choked on the the taste of them, tears rolling down her cheeks. This filled me with an overwhelming feeling of joy, I thought it was the funniest thing I had ever seen.

We started walking over to the beach, the sun shining down on us. Despite the lovely weather - the air was quite on the cold side. I eagerly zipped up my jacket and put on my hood, melting into my own little cocoon. We sprinted across the busy road, laughing as we reached the other side. We walked down a path to the edge of the sandy beach. By this point my visuals were quite evident, the leaves of the shrubbery and plants surrounding the beach began to subtlety move and wobble. It was nearing 1:30pm, over an hour and a half had passed since consuming the sandwich. As we walked across the sandy beach, I quickly took off my shoes, feeling each individual grain sink beneath and between my toes. Despite the bitter cold wind, the sun slightly heated the sand and made for quite a comforting feeling.

We continued on our brisk stroll and made our way to a nearby jetty constructed of rocks. We walked along it and sat right on the end of it. Here we talked for over half an hour, discussing the beauty of our surroundings and observing little details on the rocks. It was nearing 2pm now, and we turned behind us to see a middle aged man with a fishing rod and gear approaching. He greeted us with a strong French accent and begun asking us about our day. Through conversation we discovered that he was a French pastry chef, and that he was there to fish after finishing his shift for the day. He sat beside us and started fishing. We discussed education and about the different pathways that people choose in life. The conversation shifted to talking about how many people find pleasure and joy differently, and how often the little things in life should be cherished and appreciated.

It was around 3pm by the time we decided to leave, and both me and my friend were tripping very heavily. Every feature and detail on the rocks beneath us were so evident, so beautiful. Each shimmer and reflection that bounced off of the water from the sun sparkled in harmony with the sea. As we got up to leave, we thanked the frenchman for his company- and walked back up the jetty to the sand. As we did so, I felt a deep connection with each rock as I stepped. The feeling of the cold, smooth and slightly rough surface against my feet brought me immense joy. Everything in nature was just so incredible. I thought about how beautiful these tiny mushrooms were and how grateful I truly was for the experience. I felt a true connection with my friend as well. She looked so beautiful in the sunlight and I smiled and gave her a huge hug. I was nearly crying with joy, for I was filled with overwhelming love and truly was grateful for having such a close and special person in my life. Her eyes sparkled and she hugged me back as I knew she felt the same. We walked together arm in arm back to the station, it was only until I was able to view a wider range of objects that I realised that the visuals were becoming increasingly more intense. Each step I took felt numbed and floppy, I wasn't able to control my legs as easily as I had initially had- and pointing my finger straight proved to be an extremely difficult task. Even tying my shoelaces was almost impossible to do.

As we got onto the train, we both sat at the back of the carriage and totally absorbed into the seat. The softness and comfort that I felt was totally overwhelming. Glancing down at my watch I tried to read the time, but the Roman numerals looked foreign and odd- they appeared to be nothing I had seen before. I looked back up at my friend, who had multiple faces separating and colliding with each other. I found this humorous and simply laughed. The longing for a warm, comfortable place to relax was too strong and so we decided to head to our friends house. The train was tolerable at this point, however as more and more different people filled the seats in the carriage - I started feeling incredibly anxious and uneasy. Looking around at all the different people on the train, I realised how insignificant and small I was, how I am just a tiny human on this huge planet and began questioning my physical importance. I thought about death, about what the experience of dying would be like and the afterlife. I longed to die. I longed to see if there was more to leaving this earth, was there really an existence of heaven and hell? I was totally immersed in my thoughts.

We got off at the station near our friend's house and attempted to navigate our way there. Walking to his house was not an easy task. We continuously got lost on the way there, walking up different streets and through various parks- tripping dicks and totally confused as to which way we were to go.

The trip was very very intense by then. Trees and buildings were merging together, colours faded into one another and adorned blank surfaces. Whilst staring down at the grass I was able to see various geometric patterns and colours. Everything was one intense moving scene.

As I walked, it felt as if I wasn't in control of my movements. I didn't feel myself walk or move in the environment I was in, it was as though I was walking in another world. It was 4pm by the time we finally got to his house. We patiently waited out the front, lying in the grass and soaking up our surroundings. My friend and I tried holding a conversation between us, but found that we were barely able to talk, each word and sentence sounded dribbled and sloppy as a we tried desperately to communicate with one another. I sounded like a mess, and my lack of coordination and movement didn't help either.

Finally, our friend arrived. We quickly stumbled in his house and sat right down on the couch. He was slightly rude and was acting differently toward both of us. I sensed something was up, but I didn't quite know what. The moment he closed the front door I felt a sense of uneasiness and fear. My mood dropped significantly. A few minutes later his friend shows up and joins us. He smiled and greeted me, and was one individual whom I did not appreciate the company of. My friend who I had been tripping with lay back onto his couch. I felt our positive mood diminish at an astounding rate. Everything suddenly became dull, wrong and frightening. I felt incredibly uncomfortable and unsafe. I wrapped myself up in a blanket and put in my headphones and closed my eyes. I felt myself fall down a deep pit- patterns and colours overlaying my vision as I fell deeper and deeper. The music sounded deep and rich. I tried playing uplifting tunes but to my dismay they did not improve my mood or the experience. It felt like an artificial coverup and a bad attempt of hiding how I was feeling. This worsened my mood and I urged my friend to leave with me and walk to the nearby park, but she snuggled up on the couch and refused.

I felt myself sink further and further into my negative state. My mind erupted with thoughts. I thought about how amazing and incredibly beautiful the mushroom was, and how by staying in this environment- we were misusing it. Our friend and his mate were sitting back, drinking and ripping bongs. It was 4:30 by then and I was peaking. In conjunction with this I felt feelings of both anger and sadness, at how much we were wasting the peak of the trip, sitting at a house on the couch watching people drink and smoke. I myself was not in the mood for weed. Both me and my friend left eventually the house, leaving them behind. The positive emotional intensity of the trip had diminished, and this made me even more upset. I begun to cry-I did not wish to at all but I was no longer in control of my emotions. I felt even worse due to the fact that my own negativity had reflected onto my friend, making her feel a similar way.

We sat in the grass at the park and embraced the little time we had left of the trip. Visuals were less intense by this point in time - around 5:30pm. It started to rain quite heavily, and it lifted my spirits. I sunk into the lush green and allowed the cold water to trickle onto my face. I smiled. The rain was beautiful, as was the presence and comfort of my friend. As the rain got increasingly heavier, I craved nothing more than hot food and a warm bed. We got up and walked to the main street, my legs felt heavy and jelly-like under the weight of my body. I tried to point to the burger store, and once again struggled to fully straighten my finger. We indulged in hot chips and coffee. Every bite of the greasy fried potato warmed me from my head to my toes- it was the best tasting food I had eaten in what felt like forever. I felt comforted and safe.

As it begun to get dark, I decided to leave. I hugged my friend and wished her goodbye- her hug and care made me feel safe and loved. The trip was intense and at times overwhelming, however overall was an eventful experience.

Exp Year: 2016	ExpID: 108657
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 15
Published: Dec 18, 2016	Views: 3,092
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Mushrooms (39) : Nature / Outdoors (23), General (1), Small Group (2-9) (17)