DOSE:		smoked	Cannabis	(daily)
	50 mg	oral	Diphenhydramine
		oral	Calea zacatechichi	(tincture)
	bowls	smoked	Cannabis
		smoked	Mugwort

BODY WEIGHT:

220 lb

Around 10pm, I shared a small joint with my favorite smoking buddy, who has a much lower tolerance than me (I smoke around 2-3 times a day on a normal day, in larger amounts. She smokes a small amount daily in the evening). She got toasted off just a few hit, and she stuck around and shot the breeze with me while I finished off the joint. After that, she decided to go to bed, so I decided it would be a good night for some experimentation since I had some time to myself.

I got settled with some water, and cola to help wash the bad taste of the tincture ['Calea Zacatechichi 1 to 1 tincture 30 alcohol'] out of my mouth after. I got my water pipe set up with a large bud, and a small amount of mugwort on top. In my opinion there wasnt enough mugwort to have a physical affect, but I had around a pinch or two of it, dried and smoked in the bong with the weed. I also took 50mg of benadryl, not recreationally, but as a sleep aid, because otherwise I will not get to sleep easily or stay asleep through the night.

I set up my small bedroom shrine to Psyche and Morpheus, candles and incense lit, and spent some time praying to both of them and holding ritual for them, asking for their aid in having pleasant dreams and experiences with the substances I was taking. I took half a dropperful of the tincture at the altar, and let it sit on my saliva gland for a minute while I prayed and aligned myself with their domains, dreams and the mind. I swallowed the tincture finally, and washed it out as best as I could with cola, then brought the incense around the room to claim the space for myself, in the name of Psyche and Morpheus. I spent around ten minutes circling the room, spreading the smoke and chanting positive mantras. 'Love and light, peace and pleasure, excitement and good experience' and things like that, over and over. The purpose of all this was to put myself in a positive, confident state of mind, to improve my chances of having a good experience. I see belief as a tool, rather than an a way of making sense of the world, so I choose to believe in things in certain situations to improve my experiences, and discard those beliefs when they aren't needed or useful.

Once I was fully in the ritual mindset, I sat in front of my tiny altar again, and smoked the bong I had set up, visualizing the smoke as the energy of Morpheus and Psyche, entering my body and aligning my mind and soul with their wills. At this point, I started having auditory hallucinations, hearing a male and a female voice speaking, and eventually singing, along with the mantras I was chanting, and I assigned these voices to Morpheus and Psyche. I was aware that calea could cause auditory hallucinations already, so being aware that it would happen, the random knocks, distant voices, and growl noises didn't bother me or take me out of my ritual mindset. Other than the voices, which I was mentally feeding into and encouraging, all other hallucinations were very mild and easy to ignore. I have had hallucinations, both auditory and visual, outside of drug use before, so this is something to keep in mind with my experience.

Once I finished smoking, I took the second half of the dropper, sat with it on my saliva gland for at least a minute, and said my last prayer and invocation, before chasing down the tincture with more cola, blowing out my candles, and sitting back to just pay attention to what I was feeling. The high was definitely different than just weed alone. I felt extremely relaxed and calm, with a gentle tingling sensation in my scalp and shoulders, and a euphoric sensation in the middle of my chest. Emotionally, I was definitely happy, calm, and had an overall sensation of inner peace. I felt at peace with my thoughts, watching them come and pass rather than becoming them. This let me discard any kind of fear or negative thoughts easily, because I never took those thoughts and feelings into my sense of self to begin with. The combination of calea, weed, and the ritual mindset, made mindfulness very easy to achieve. I could feel my own heartbeat gently thumping away, and my whole body felt warm.

After that, I went to bed, hoping for vivid dreams. Weed does inhibit REM according to others, but I've never had that experience smoking it. My brain chemistry is a bit unique to others though, because of mental illness. I still have dreams, including vivid ones, almost every night. Falling asleep was the most pleasant part of the experience. Laying down, the relaxation and the euphoric feeling both increased significantly, and I could feel my heartbeat echo through my whole body. With my eyes closed and covered, I felt like I was floating through space, suspended in nothingness. I saw sparks on the back of my eyes, which gradually grew into mild visual hallucinations. The hallucinations would cease if I opened and uncovered my eyes. I saw mainly trippy, psychedelic things, like I was looking at random objects and scenes through a kaleidoscope. Some were disconcerting and scary, like spiders or creepy clowns without eyes, but because of the state of mindfulness I was in, I simply let these hallucinations come and pass without being bothered by them.

Not long after this, I fell asleep. My dreams were more vivid than usual, but not by much . The actual effect on my dreaming was underwhelming. I feel like this might be because REM doesn't usually happen until several hours after falling asleep, so the calea was most likely worn off by the time I started dreaming. I had a dream where I got to interact first hand with my own story characters, and I vividly remember the sound of their voices, something I had never decided on consciously before. Even so, their voices all fit them perfectly. I can't remember most of it unfortunately, but it was a very positive experience.

Waking up the next day, I still felt very docile and calm, and kind of in a fog. I felt drowsy, but in a pleasant way, especially since I was still laying down with a sleep mask on. My body refused to sleep anymore, but I spent around an hour just laying silently in bed, daydreaming blissfully about the things I had seen in my dreams. The only reason I stopped and decided to get up, was because I had to use the bathroom. I had slept for ten and a half hours, normal for me when I've had benadryl.

Overall, the experience was very positive, both while awake and while asleep.

Exp Year: 2016	ExpID: 109211
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 20
Published: Nov 8, 2016	Views: 2,535
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Dreams (85), Cannabis (1), Calea zacatechichi (97) : Alone (16), Personal Preparation (45), Entities / Beings (37), Combinations (3)