DOSE:			Smarts	(daily)
			Cannabis	(daily)

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

It's early in the morning, I've just written about four songs with multiple live instrumentals that are self recorded, and I'm about to write more in my book. But before I do, I feel that I should share with humanity what has unlocked the capability for me to even undergo such tasks for someone like me.

Back story; I have had depression in the past (though not for weeks at this moment), and I have panic attacks somewhat regularly. I have previously had a 2MG alprazolam (Xanax) prescription, as well as a 10MG zolpidem (Ambien) prescription, from 2010-2014. The comedown from the daily usage of such drugs for that prolonged period of time was taxing, to say the least. I began to wean myself off of those substances about two years ago. But in order to do that, I had been relying heavily on steady daily dosages of 100ml tequila, 0.75g of cannabis, 6g of tobacco, and 5g of kratom, with occasional...anything once a week. And I mean anything. Well, except for methamphetamine, heroin and crack.

In October of 2015, I was t-boned by a Ford F-150 while I was on a bicycle, and when I hit the curb, I hit it on my shoulder, causing a torn labrum, rotator cuff damage and a nasty headache, with x-rays showing no concussion or brain damage. But I could tell that something was a little off, especially with my short term and long term memory. I didn't have the surgery until the following February, due to the my lack of monetary resources. It was only during the recovery period that I began to realize that my memory loss wasn't just due to trauma or the accident itself, but it had been a steady thing in my life for many years, especially during my so called recovery phase. I had just chosen a different way to do damage by switching prescription addictions to an overall drug addiction. Coming to that realization was the most sobering experience for me, and I became determined that I still had the means to correct my situation, no matter how dire it might be. In March of 2016, I decided to move to a place that I could truly heal. I lived in the US, so why not stay in the country and move to a state that legalized cannabis? So that's what I did.

As the first few months went by, I planted myself in the state firmly. In May, I got a 9-5 in the financial sector, and started taking the bus everywhere. But while my overall demeanor was much alleviated, my memory was still not nearly where I wanted it to be. I had known about nootropics for a while, but had neglected to try them because of the fact that effects take a very long time to fully manifest. But here I was, in the promised land, with nothing to lose. So since July of 2016, my weekly regimen of chemicals looks like this;

Monday-Saturday
Alpha GPC-325mg twice daily
Uridine-250mg twice daily
Cannabis-0.2g at night

Sunday (or any off day)
Alpha GPC-325mg twice daily
Uridine-250mg twice daily
Cannabis-0.3g spread through the day
Phenibut-500mg at 9:00am

Literally, I cannot stress enough how much this weekly schedule has done for me. The daily combination of Alpha-GPC and Uridine allows me to function in a high paced environment with millions of dollars on the line, while the Phenibut allows me to breathe easier on the days that I don't have to dwell on numbers. In addition, I went from abusing narcotics and holding down food service and retail jobs to having the ability to choose to finish the songs and books that I'm finally able to work on and pursue a life of art, or continue my upwards career in the financial sector.

I would never have been able to do either of those without these substances. My anxiety was giving me writers block for literally years beforehand, while my job was getting progressively more difficult, what with having to remember more procedures and regulations the further I went within my company. I didn't choose this weekly schedule to get high, I chose it to survive. Instead, I ended up thriving.

Exp Year: 2016	ExpID: 109555
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 25
Published: Jan 29, 2021	Views: 2,688
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alpha-GPC (783), Smarts - Phenibut (379), Cannabis (1) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Glowing Experiences (4), Performance Enhancement (50), Combinations (3), Various (28)