DOSE:	1 tablet	oral	MDMA	(pill / tablet)
	repeated	smoked	Tobacco - Cigarettes
	1 tablet	oral	MDMA	(pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

About two weeks ago, I and eight of my close friends went to a local rave. Once we entered, all of us dispersed among the crowd of pulsating bodies. Eventually, I met up with three others: N, M, and J. I purchased three blue D&G tablets for M, J & I, and two white rolex tabs for N & I. This was the seventh time I had rolled.

J, M and I ate our blue pills, and hugged. N wandered off, and so the three of us stuck together and went outside for a smoke. Once we'd had a few cigarettes a piece, we wandered back inside and danced together. We bought a bottle of water to share, and once it was empty we went into the bathrooms to fill it up.

Now, this is about 30 to 40 minutes after we had taken the E, and we were all growing impatient. This was only intensified by the presence of the many girls in the bathroom who were already rolling.

I hugged J and M goodbye, and went outside for another cigarette- but much to my surprise, this is when it hit me. My face broke apart into a wide grin.

My ex-boyfriend had also attended the rave, and he found me outside smoking. And despite all of the euphoria I was feeling, all of the love I had for every being outside in the sprinkles of rain with me, he was the one person who scared me. His eyes were horrifying. Just looking into them made me sick to my stomach. His pupils were dilated, and the pools of black began to swirl as I stared into them, flickering green and yellow and white-- conveying to me a sense of evil. I managed to suck in another drag of my cigarette, but it caused me to retch. On the verge of puking, I flicked the cherry off of my cigarette and saved it for later.

My ex followed me inside, I felt the need to have J and M by my side. I bolted to the bathrooms, and found them there. I was safe!

Once I had reached a comfortable environment, I relaxed, and the first intense wave to signify my peak hit me. I cuddled with my group for a great deal. I ate my other pill. This is where I lose track of time.

We decided to hit the dance floors, but somehow I was separated from J and M. I thought I saw someone who resembled one of my best friends, a beautiful, petite girl from my old highschool, and so I ran over to her and yelled, 'HI!! Where have you been?! I missed you!'

She responded as if she had known me, but as soon as she looked me straight in the eyes I realized she was not my friend. But the resemblance she had to my friend gave me a closeness to her, and immediately had the urge... I needed her to be mine. I had found my soulmate, and I could really FEEL it.

We exchanged names, and I thought it my responsibility to get her phone number -- but no one had a pen! So we swore to each other that we would get numbers at the end of the night.

I continued to see her throughout the evening, and whenever I would see her look back at me, my heart would race. I would smile, without thinking about it. I wanted to hold her, to be able to spend every moment with her. I was in love. And I never even got to kiss her.

She gave me her favorite piece of candy, an amazing rainbow bracelet that when I now look at it, I begin to tear up and feel empty inside.

We sat together against the wall, watching the beauty of people in movement on the dancefloor.. and she leaned over to me, her nose touching mine, and said, 'We're soulmates, we're meant to be.' and gave me a hug. This is when I peaked on my second pill.

My feelings toward her were so intense, I can't even describe them.

But in the end, I witnessed her making out with some half-naked guy in the corner.. and I felt my heart break. I never got to say goodbye-- my friends caught up with me and dragged me outside and into the car. We were headed for an afterparty. And it was only midnight. It felt like an eternity had gone by. I cried myself to sleep for two or three days. And I never even got her phone number.

Although she was intimate with someone else, I understand that she was rolling and that it seemed appropriate to her at the time. In two weeks I'll be going to another rave that she told me she would be at, and I'll find her. And we'll be together again.

All in all, it was a good time-- until the end. But love conquers all, and I forgive her. After all, she's the love of my life.

Exp Year: 2001	ExpID: 11290
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jun 21, 2019	Views: 878
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MDMA (3) : General (1), Rave / Dance Event (18)