DOSE: T+ 0:00	1.5 - 2.0 hits	oral	LSD	(liquid)
T+ 1:15	40 mg	oral	4-AcO-DMT	(capsule)

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

I had been looking forward to a weekend off from chores and responsibility, having recently moved house and started work on a new contract - it had been a hectic month, so I was enthusiastic to take some acid and listen to records on my day off.

1:15 pm

Approx 1.5 - 2 Hits of LSD, I haphazardly measured out some liquid LSD that we had previously watered down by a factor of 4 - as it was the last few drops in the bottle and we didn’t want to waste it.

By two o’clock in the afternoon the trip starts with mild visuals, euphoria and general wellbeing. The clouds and the trees in the garden warp and twist, faint mandala style overlays but nothing major. Closed eye visuals consist of greyscale fractals, machinescapes and rainbow highlights. Minimal body load and a really mild nausea. I feel pretty disappointed, I’ve been increasing my doses bit by bit over the last year, seeking some ‘next level’ and arrogantly posturing as a psychonaut.

3:30 pm

For some reason, the acid seems to be wearing off, I’d eaten a light breakfast some hours earlier of bacon, sausage and eggs - no bread or starches. The euphoria has subsided, as has the nausea. I complain to my lovely girlfriend (who is completely sober and busy with other things) that it hasn’t really done much for me and I announce that I intend to take some more. My vision is slightly distorted but I’m competent enough to operate the digital scales to check what comes next…

Next up is approximately 40mg of 4-aco-DMT, my source has told me that the individual capsules are 20’s but I weigh an empty one and compare them. Satisfied enough with the accuracy of his doses I take two - for a total of 40mg. After popping the brown little capsules I stand staring out of my conservatory at the trees, willing the universe to show me what it’s got. ‘Come on then!’ I say to myself inside my head….

Twenty minutes later the come up is abrupt and startling, my conservatory and living room are outlined in neon, the highlights on any polished surface sparkle like sunlight on a moving sea - every surface is decorated with hieroglyphic writing that crawls and melts across it. The world begins to shift, as if the resolution of my vision is increasing, the open eye visuals are the most incredible I have experienced to date. 3D geometry is forming on and around every object and unlike other trips it isn’t a transparent overlay, it doesn’t waver, distort or shift, it is static and solid, like a photo-real rendering of a cartoon.

What comes next is the most terrifying experience of my life. Looking out across my garden I notice that the plants and trees are changing, the surfaces smooth out and the colours shift along the spectrum, I become focused on one small area and watch as alien noodle plants grow where previously there was grass. I stare dumbfounded for an eternity, time seems to be meaningless now, and when I break my gaze, suddenly and without warning, the world has been ‘replaced’. Every object is now rendered in stunning CGI - wireframe buckyball outlines of strange structures populate a weird alien landscape, where shadows have been banished and only an ambient occlusion remains - I become convinced I have been transported to another dimension or kidnapped by aliens and thrown into a replica of my home - a zoo for human specimens.

I feel very alone and childlike, I cannot understand what is happening and I am deeply afraid. It feels like I am being shown some incomprehensibly complex system and being asked to interact with it without any context or instructions , I am aware of just how stupid I am. My memories are wiped, my sense of self is gone and I have no idea where I am or how I got here. The vision is completely static, as I walk around, the perspective changes, it feels like a movie set or virtual reality, if i leave the room and come back, the scene is the same as when I left it - the hallucination appears solid and permanent. I lose my ability to cope, having been completely ill-prepared by my previous psychedelic experiences for this kind of trip.

I am a fan of psychedelic art but I have never seen anything like this. In every other trip I have experienced it felt at least a little familiar, the mandalas, the flaming eyes, colour palette, the winged entities, the rainbow machinescapes and kaleidoscopic geometry, even the neon tentacles and visions of being a Mexican policeman - these were comfortable territory for me, not so this time.

After what feels like years, I remember that my girlfriend is in the other room, I am not alone. I swallow my pride and I decide to get help, for some reason I am absolutely ashamed of myself and all I can do is apologise for interrupting her afternoon. I try to explain the situation and she manages to trip sit me out of this terrifying headspace.

We sat for a while in our conservatory while she feeds me peanuts and tea (she had not been replaced by the aliens, but looked perfectly normal) and I talked whilst she asked me questions and offered ideas, during this conversation I experienced visions of how the human consciousness is physically constructed, what pathways are involved in making a decision, or having a thought. I saw each block of my personality and how it was connected and one by one each block was disconnected from the whole. As the network of my mind shut down I became unable to think or understand and ended up simply being experience and nothing more.

It turns out that my girlfriend had recorded the entire conversation on my phone, listening back to it, the aeon of mindlessness and the dissolution of my consciousness happened in the blink of an eye between sentences. After my mind returned, several of my failings in how I interact with the world had been revealed to me, lessons on ego, pride, selfishness and honesty had all been outlined by the experience and to be frank I didn’t feel too pleased about it.

8pm

Slowly, the vision began to recede, first my dining table and conservatory returned to normal, leaving only the alien terrarium outside the glass, then that too faded leaving only a mild disco light at the periphery of my vision and some closed eye symmetrical geometry which lasted for the next few hours and left me with a headache.

Despite the abject terror and confusion, I am determined to repeat this combination and explore its implications.

Trip time: 10 hours

Exp Year: 2021	ExpID: 115341
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 39
Published: May 19, 2021	Views: 651
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