On the Cusp of Something
Salvia divinorum
Citation: TheGardener. "On the Cusp of Something: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (exp115678)". Erowid.org. Oct 1, 2021. erowid.org/exp/115678
DOSE: |
2.5 g | buccal | Salvia divinorum | (dried) |
BODY WEIGHT: | 145 lb |
Before we continue, I want to state that I did not consume any drugs during or before the quid experience, and I do not take any medications. I have never taken psychedelics and the only hallucinogens I have tried are cannabis and DPH. I have also drank alcohol but I do so very infrequently, as well as having taken kratom for the first time a few weeks prior, and a second time about 5 days prior. The day before, I smoked weed, but I only smoke on the weekends so I do not consider myself to have a high tolerance.
I soaked the 2.5 grams of dry leaf in about 2 shot glasses worth of cold water, and while they soaked I went to brush my gums/tongue. I did this to brush off the dead cells in my mouth so the Salvinorin-A could more readily absorb into my bloodstream. I feel like I brushed too hard though, since when I spit out I noticed a little bleeding. Oh well. By the time I came back from the restroom, I met with my trip-sitter in the living room. He was there to sit with me and write notes on anything I do/say. I looked down at the dish of wet salvia leaves. Perhaps I had poured too much water, as about half of it didn’t absorb. I sipped this leftover water and held it in my mouth for five minutes. After that, I swallowed it and put all the wet, ground leaves in my mouth. My journey had started
T-0:00
As I put the leaves in my mouth, I was struck by how MUCH of them there were. While 2.5 grams was supposedly on the smaller side for quid dosage, it took up so much space in my mouth. The leaves were pretty bitter with a distinct “plant” taste. During this first phase of chewing, I made my way to my bed, got under the sheets and my trip-sitter sat down on a chair in the corner of the room. He was taking notes, and had a camcorder turned on towards me filming the experience. The whole room was dark as we covered up all the windows. The only light in the room was a bright purple light radiating from my closet in front of me (from a grow light, since I grow some trichocereus). as well as a blue light from a neon sign I had up, to my left. We sat and laid in silence as I chewed.
T-0:10
Ten minutes have passed by and I am extremely anxious. I have no idea what is going to happen, and although I trusted the plant, I became very scared of being suddenly pulled into anything I was not ready for. The silence made me uneasy. The suspense was killing me. Despite this, I tried to keep calm and reminded myself it was a low dose and I shouldn't resist what happens. Around this time I hear extremely faint vocalizing- that of a woman. This was so faint that I thought to myself it could just be placebo, or some hypnagogic hallucination instead of the salvia. I try closing my eyes, and as time passes the vocalizing grows faintly.
T-0:15
I keep letting out chortles or laughs. I have no idea what's funny, but the mass of leaves in my mouth just seems absurd. At this point, I definitely have a light mental fog going on, and the confusion does not couple well with a bunch of spit and salvia in my mouth. My mouth has salivated so much that I almost feel like I might choke since I’m lying down. I feel like my body is getting stretched, and a feeling of being spun-around (as if I’m being swung around by my feet) washes over me. None of these feelings are intense, and being quite similar to the feelings I get as I drift into sleep, I chalk it up to my sleepiness instead of the salvia. Still anxious, I decide to focus on these hypnagogic images and await to see what happens next.
T-0:20
I motioned to my trip-sitter to lend me something to cover my eyes with, as I fear I am chasing away the experience by having to manually close my eyes. He lends me a shirt and I put it over my face. I try to focus on what I’m feeling: My head feels a bit weird. I get this sensation that’s similar to me falling asleep, and perhaps that’s what it was. I imagine a crowd of people in my head, cheering me on and making bets on what will happen during my experience. This is very subtle, and shifts to the thought- or perhaps the sensation- of having marbles in my head.
T-0:25
I take the shirt off of my face. No other visions or tactile hallucinations have appeared, but I feel pretty sedated and have a slight confusion and mental fog still. I realize the female vocalization has stopped, but it must have been recently as I remember it being there for a solid 20 minutes or so. At this point, I feel slightly frustrated. I feel like I keep chasing away the experience by moving around, opening my eyes, chewing, or just getting anxious. I feel like up to this point, everything I’ve experienced is so subtle that it might as well be placebo.
T-0:30
My mouth is full of spit, almost to the point where I feel like choking. I can't keep chewing without almost gagging at everything in my mouth. I attempt to swallow some of it, but ultimately I spit out the excess liquid into the bowl, trying to avoid spitting out any leaves. I look up and try to relax. My mental fog at this point is slightly more intense, everything feels sort of dream-like. The room seems to shift red. After a few seconds the hues shift blue. I ask my trip-sitter what color the room is. The combination of the purple grow light and the blue neon light make it seem purple-blue to the average person. This is strange, as the room seemed almost completely red a second ago. I try to focus on the experience. I can tell I'm on the cusp of something, but I don’t know for sure. Every time I let out some sort of noise to chew or communicate with my sitter, I feel like I chase the experience away. I mumble “sorry” a few times to the salvia for this. I feel like I am expecting too much.
T-0:35
I look up at my room. Something about the perspective seems wrong. Perhaps I am not used to seeing my room with only the grow-lamp on. Where the wall in front of me meets the ceiling, I notice a horizontal shadow. This shadow isn’t a hallucination, as I’ve seen it before, but it seems… fuzzier than usual. I notice that at whatever point I look at the shadow, a fisheye effect is applied to it. As I move my gaze, the swollen and spiraling fisheye moves with it. “Oh my god” I say out loud. This is undeniably not placebo. At this point, this seemed like perhaps the funniest thing- The plant itself is giving me undeniable evidence that it has entered my brain, as if to say “Of course, I’m not placebo, look at this shit!”. This made me laugh hysterically.
T-0:40
At this point, the sedation is perhaps at its peak or even past its peak, and trying to keep myself in the experience, I keep my eyes half-closed. Still able to see the room, I see tiny and faint streaks of light appearing at the bottom of my vision and traveling upwards before disappearing. They look like very faint comets and come in light pastels of blue, pink, and yellow. “What!?” I say in astonishment.
T-0:45
I recount some of my visions to my trip-sitter. I let him know what I’m feeling. I feel like most of the visions, already being subtle, have passed. What lingers is a sort of mental confusion, and a feeling of restlessness. I shift around multiple times under my blankets. I put on my glasses.
T-1:00
After a while, nothing else seems to happen. I ask my trip sitter to turn the room light on. I also ask him to microwave some french fries that we have in the fridge, and he leaves to do so. Perhaps my last hallucination, just as I think everything is over, I hear a female voice to my right say “How are you doing?”. This sounds faint, but at the same time sounds like the source of the voice is right next to me. Normally this would scare me, but in my current state it did not. My trip sitter comes back with the french fries and I eat them. I still have this feeling of weirdness lingering. I feel a bit disappointed that I did not have 3 grams of leaf material, as I feel that would have been able to show me more, but at the same time I feel grateful for the experience I did get.
T-1:30
I feel mostly normal, and I recount to my trip-sitter everything I experienced, what I felt and what I thought. I make plans to perhaps smoke some 20X extract in the near future, to further explore this realm. The general weirdness lasts another half hour and by then I return to baseline
T-2:00
I feel like I have definitely come back to a cognitive baseline. Hopefully I can acquire some more salvia leaves in the future to quid, but since smoking is more economical, I will have to experiment with the small amount of 20X extract I have until then.
Smoking weed later that night felt a bit different; it felt a bit shifted and a bit more dysphoric, but that could have nothing to do with the salvia at all. Since I am writing this report a few days after the experience, I also want to comment that after experimenting with smoking 20X the next day (with minimal effects), weed also felt dysphoric and threw me into a pretty heavy dissociative and existential state. Again, It could have nothing to do with the salvia as there were many other unusual variables present that night.
Exp Year: 2021 | ExpID: 115678 |
Gender: Male | |
Age at time of experience: 18 | |
Published: Oct 1, 2021 | Views: 1,414 |
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Salvia divinorum (44) : General (1), Entities / Beings (37), Guides / Sitters (39), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17) |
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