DOSE:

100 mg

oral

MDMA

BODY WEIGHT:

160 lb

The first time I took MDMA was at a Full-Moon Gathering. I received half of a Domino which contained approx 150mg of MDMA. So I dosed, and then proceeded to wander around the festival. The come-up was nearly instantaneous from an empty-stomach. I was with my friend who was a bit shy, so this was a chance for us to open-up and connect with other people.

I started breathing better, I felt energized, and I felt much more in-tune with my surroundings. I noticed that I was still fighting against the flow of energy out from my heart. I was resisting this Heart-Opening. So I basically wandered around grinding my teeth with bulging eyes for most of the festival. First time was kinda silly. Dose was too high and it upset my stomach. Hard to enjoy the festival when your intestines are churning and cramping.

Since then I have taken MDMA a few times. I micro-dosed it before an open-mic night to enhance my creativity and relieve stage-fright. It did help, and we attended a nice afterparty around a fire. I connected with a lovely beautiful lady. Very spontaneous and pleasant! Connecting, talking, and physically holding hands was definitely encouraged and enhanced. Normal barriers were easier to pass.

I've also taken it completely alone and laid in silent darkness a few times. The complete opposite of going to an external party. I've noticed that it activated my heart and emotional centers powerfully. All of that deep messy emotional stuff that I hide so well resurfaced. Many of this is not necessarily pleasant. Repressed traumas/ memories, broken heart, losses, deaths, etc.

However, the MDMA helped me be more comfortable during the emotional storm. Like a nice warm house during a blizzard. It has helped me do important inner-work as well as enhance my ability to connect with others.

Peace

Exp Year: 2016	ExpID: 115851
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Nov 29, 2023	Views: 48
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MDMA (3) : General (1), First Times (2), Glowing Experiences (4), Relationships (44), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Various (28)