DOSE:

1.5 tablets

oral

LSD

(blotter / tab)

BODY WEIGHT:

120 lb

This Is a Special Drug

It was my first summer in college, and really my first extended time away from my family, a distant but love filled father, and loving mother and sister. It was a beautiful thick hot fourth of July night in Tallahassee.

A cohort from my dorm, with whom I had recently been spending slack time with(pretty much all the time) said he would get me some acid for the fourth of July party at his older friend's house. He did, and he showed me it in the bathroom of her house. It was black with little computerized fractal swirls. We both started chewing and sucking on the paper straight away.

My friend would ask me if anything was different, I didn't think so. We sat on a couch outside in the night, the spinning flower fireworks were erupting on the driveway, surrounded by shadows of laughing kids. Then I looked into his eyes, and they were suddenly cat's eyes, the pupil carved down the middle, his big nose wrinkling in a knowing smile. I also smiled and I said we should go somewhere to talk.

We went to the swing set in the side grass alley of the house. Flying out and back in that rusty seat, I was aware that my view of the receeding trees was new. It could have been trails on the swaying green leaves, but let me say it was more of a feeling that I had never looked at this simple things properly. I was very happy.

Now the party wore on, and I found myself sitting alone at a small table between the kitchen and the folks in the living room. I looked at my arm, my forearm, and thought of those horror stories where kids go off seeing bugs all over themselves, I wondered if that could happen to me. I thought hard about it and I supose I pushed myself over that wire with my own curiosity, because now throbbing little 'Spiderman' bugs were searching beneath my skin. I don't know if this ability was always inside of me, but know I was aware that I could drive myself into a flurry of panic If I only wished it. I know now that Poe takes about man's nature of the perverse, of how we torture ourselves better than anyone else could, but at that time this possibility of scaring my own wits was like a big red button just dying to be pushed. Of course I pushed it.

The rest of the night was filled with glorious views of nature, and distant street lights. Music was(especially Cars Trucks and Buses by Phish) a visible bouncing ball of light, bending to my conducting hand. We were back at the emptying house, and someone on the floor exclaimed that they don't trip the way I was tripping. That made me proud, but soon after I felt like an attention hogging fool. I was bein g honest in my travel, but now,(granted it was a harmless remark) I felt showy, and distant. I didn't speak much after that and just sat on the couch staring up at the black light placed in the ceiling fan. Distance can cause trouble for me in a group setting. There was a couple on the floor nearby. A nice chubby faced boyfriend and girl friend. I felt at once attracted to her, and at the same time embarrased by my inability to control sexual desires(Because we should control them, right? :)) and the song in the room was now...'My friend my friend hes got a wife....' The coincidence was startling, and I drew in further as not to be found out for my desire to connect with the girl on the floor.

The purple light in the ceiling was drawing me in. It was a game. I needed to release something in order to move on to the next level(perhaps I just needed to lay a fat kiss on that girl's cheek), but I was in my head and there I stayed. I relaxed every muscle, moved up, I released every notion, moved up, I rolled back my eyes, moved up....I pissed myself...Stood up.

Needles to say that was the end of paradise that night, and I felt awful(later) for having urinated all over this strangers couch. A few of the guys there took me home to the dorm, the car ride was a cartoon of looming white stars on a navy blue city. Back in my room I stripped completely, not caring that they were right behind me, almost relishing it. I could not sleep. No, sleep would definetly not come. My room mate chatted with me for a bit, but soon he had to knock off, he was tired but still interested in what had happened to me(but more tired than that).

I continued to push my big red button alone by myself, and even fancied being sucked full body down the drain of the common bathroom. Painful. I had to piss alot(apparently I didn't get it all out on the sofa) and the bubbles in the bowl were a crowd of sumo wrestlers smiling at me with slanted eyes. I waited through the sunrise until my friend from across the hall, the one who supllied me, returned. He did return. He was chiding me for the incident with the piss and all, and I was head bowed and shamefull.

As the day wore on, he told me he felt weird the whole night, and that he was sorry for giving me so much acid on my first time. I didn't really care what he had to say, I just wanted to ride my bike and get some breadsticks at an Italian fast food joint. We did. Then we rode to the house of the party and I apologized to the stranger who owned the couch. He said OK.

It is seven years later and I do think about that night almost every day. It was hard to shake it at first, but time goes on, and time is very strong. I don't speak to the kid across the hall anymore, but the guy with the pee stained couch is one of my good friends.

Exp Year: 1996	ExpID: 20020
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 7, 2019	Views: 1,047
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