DOSE:	500 mg	oral	Pharms - Divalproex	(pill / tablet)
	1 cig.	smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

Found a kind of nice combination of things. One summer night I took Depakote which is a presciption anti-seizure med commonly used as a mood stabilizer. I went downtown to hang-out and have a coffee. I ran into a friend and he and I smoked a joint.

I don't remember too much, except for the really spiritual impressions that I got all night long, and some thoughts and emotions that were largely normal, but for some reason my brain seemed to process them as hallucinatory because of a kind of 'choppy' and 'dissociative' quality.

I remember the weed hit me kind of harder than usual, and I left the outdoor table at the coffee house for the parking lot across the street where a lot of people hung out and played car stereos. I told my friend, 'I can't take this, I gotta go hide.' I'm kind of over the rainbow as far as remembering whether it was light or dark--everytime I remember the conversation it seems like it had happened at a different time of day. I think I was asking him about art, but in a kind of God-is-an-astronaut type way, and he gave me really basic answers, but they seemed really cryptic and elliptical, like I would say, 'What is the importance of art?' And he would say, 'It's watching the colors.' Then, I would say, 'What is time in painting?' And he would say, 'It is watching the leaves fall.'

I ran across the street and climbed up a fire-escape to sit on the platform. Then, as it got dark, I depersonalized. I became a line that vibrated with the music I heard, then the line dissolved, and I was all alone and started to panic. I was lying in a heap up on the fire-escape. You know how sometimes you can have a nightmare that scares you so much that you can't even scream when you wake up? That's where my voice went, and I could only weakly say a few words...

I think I curled up and vomited through the grated floor of the escape. That's when the magic happened. Some candy kids were close by, and one girl came up and played nurse. I vomited two more times. She gave me some water.

When I looked at her face, I felt a feeling like someone gave me a big-ass hug. I thought I had gone to that numb and fuzzy place never to return, but she was like a beacon on light in the dark. I didn't hallucinate visuals, or hear anything, but I wasn't in Kansas anymore: I was surrounded by swimminess, water as far as I could imagine, and I understand that traquil-water fantasies are like an orgasm without the mess. I came to see that everything was really just like water--it looked together, but easy to separate. An impression of showering electrons. Words were like buoys, bobbing in and out of the sea of reality. I said it. Bob. Bob. Bob. Like hypnosis. Everything was rippley.

All in all, it was a feeling like no other, and I think I slept well after the more intense aspects of the high wore off. I haven't forgotten or really ever gotten over the feeling of it since.

Only side effects that I noticed are that I have a tendency to get all sorts of things backwards now, especially in thought, emotion, and language, but it's more of an annoyance than anything.

Exp Year: 2000	ExpID: 21490
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 15, 2005	Views: 21,448
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Pharms - Divalproex (275) : Combinations (3), Small Group (2-9) (17)