DOSE:

3.5 g

oral

Mushrooms

(dried)

BODY WEIGHT:

165 lb

The first time I tripped on shrooms was the summer of 2002. Taking a suggestion from an experienced friend, me and my girlfriend went to a place called the arboretum. This place is just acres and acres of beautifully managed gardens, with footpaths and one main road. There are japanese gardens, big open fields, woods, and lots and lots of flowers and green. We each took an eighth of an ounce, neither of us having done it or knowing what to expect. I had heard accounts from friends and acquaintances of mine, and I was extremely excited and curious as to what a trip on shrooms would entail.

I knew it was kicking in when I became preoccupied with intricate patterns I was seeing in every leaf and bush and tree trunk. It was incredible how many patterns were popping out at me. I had brought along my cd player, so I popped in Incubus and laid down on the grass and stared up at the sky. If you have ever seen a time lapse video of clouds, then you will understand what I saw. The clouds were racing across the sky at super speed... I could see every tendril and vapor twisting and twirling inside these huge puffy clouds miles high. It was incredible, I was laughing and crying. I felt like I did this for 5 or ten minutes but when I asked my friend, she told me I was lying down for an hour and a half.

While I was watching the clouds, my friend had been wandering around and found a gazebo perched on the top of a hill. She came back to get me and led me back to it. We sat across from each other on the benches inside the gazebo. We both just watched each other. Then, slowly, her face grew to a disproportionate size and broke up into 3 pieces. The pieces sort of floated around each other, then regrouped and her face was the right size again. She said 'what?' and the word drifted out of her mouth in a shimmering cloud. The walls of the gazebo were breathing in and out. It was around this time I began to feel uneasy. Everything was fascinating, but very strange and I couldn't control the hallucinations and feelings of surreality. We decided to take the bus downtown (downtown Seattle). We walked up the main road to the bus stop. As we were walking, my uneasy feelings were escalating into panic. I was wearing a hawaiian lei, and I began to handle this, believing that it was my only link to reality and, thus, sanity.

We got to the bus stop and sat down on the bench. At this point, we were experiencing totally different realities and I couldn't convey my feelings to my friend. She was just too gone to focus on me. My panic had escalated into what felt damn near like insanity. My knuckles were white from gripping the lei. The feelings came in waves, like everything else. Everything was flowing, breathing, existing on a wave-like pattern. At one point I would peak the wave and feel OK, enjoy my trip. But then the wave would carry me down under and I felt like screaming. Ripping my hair out. Gouging out my eyes with my fingernails, which looked like bird claws. The urge to run out into the middle of the busy street, sit down, and wail was overpowering. I had to wrap my arms around my body to prevent myself from doing so.

Time crawled along slowly, It felt like the bus didn't come for hours. Finally it did, and we climbed on and sat at the back. A middle aged man sitting beside us began casually talking to us. It's a good thing he didn't ask us any questions, because I couldn't understand a word he was saying. I heard him, but the words didn't make sense. I could see the words though. They came out of his mouth in pink puffs. There was a man sitting a few rows down looking at me. I felt like he knew I was tripping, every time I looked at him his eyes would bore into mine and he would cackle. We got off the bus downtown and I began to feel sane again. The people and the business of it all felt real. We found a coffee shop to sit down in. We sat by the window, and remembering that I had brought notepads, I took them out and for the next two hours I alternated between people-watching and writing. Writing was beautiful. The words and lines just flowed out of my pencil like magic. Words had found a new meaning. When I was people watching, I couldn't get over the fact of how beautiful diversity is. I couldn't believe what a beautiful thing it is that everyone is individual. The empathy was overwhelming.

All in all, I have mixed feelings about the trip. It was wonderful, terrifying, eye-opening. I'm glad I tried it, but the downside is that every now and then I will have flashbacks of the anxiety I felt during the bad part. They are quick but intense.

Exp Year: 2002	ExpID: 22735
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Sep 27, 2017	Views: 1,130
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Mushrooms (39) : Difficult Experiences (5), Glowing Experiences (4), Nature / Outdoors (23), First Times (2), Public Space (Museum, Park, etc) (53)