DOSE:

repeated

oral

Alcohol

(liquid)

BODY WEIGHT:

135 lb

I am in charge of the night operations of a small bank in a small state, and as such work the graveyard shift in a brightly lit, climate controlled room, by myself.

This in and of itself is not so bad.

The problem is that I come home from work at 7:30 in the morning and tend to want to indulge in the same indulgences in which I indulged when I was working during the day. In other words, I get pissed drunk before going to bed like I used to, but because of the time of day, I don't go to bed. I'll stay up for hours and days at a time, because I get too fucked up to feel like sleeping. I might get a little tired, but I have a few more drinks and smoke a bowl or two and no longer care too much.

Seven PM or so rolls around and I really feel kind of tired, but at that point I'm so drunk that I don't think it's worth it to get a little nap before I go to work. I might sleep for a little bit at work, during down-time, but I hardly get any rest at all. I mean, think about that for a second... People who work normal daytime shifts might get shit-faced when they go home at night, and might only get three hours of sleep before going to work, but at least they do sleep a little. But a person working the third shift has a million reasons to not sleep during the day... I hardly ever do. I get drunk and start cleaning up the house or recording music or writing poetry or, hell, just jerking off or whatever. It just hardly ever seems like the middle of the afternoon is a good time to sleep, I guess.

I worry about myself sometimes. I really believe that I still drink for the fun of it, just because I like being drunk. I don't yet consider myself an alcoholic. But I do notice that when I drink, as I have today, I am less likely to get the rest I need to function properly at work 'the next day'. I do my job perfectly well, but I only get away with showing up half asleep because I'm in the building all by myself. Part of me wonders whether I would get fired for being a substance abuser if I worked under tighter supervision, like during the day.

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 31990
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jun 15, 2006	Views: 7,904
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Alcohol (61) : Health Problems (27), Retrospective / Summary (11), Alone (16)