Ltd Ed 'Solve et Elucido' Art Giclee
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I Wanted to Die
Diphenhydramine (Unisom)
Citation:   Julie. "I Wanted to Die: An Experience with Diphenhydramine (Unisom) (exp5057)". Erowid.org. Jan 11, 2002. erowid.org/exp/5057

 
DOSE:
32 tablets oral Diphenhydramine
BODY WEIGHT: 140 lb
Well, I was suicidal. I didn't take all those sleeping pills for a trip, I took them to die. I took them around 7pm and then went to sleep. I woke up about 2 hours later cause the phone was ringing. It took me like a minute to pick up the phone cause I kept on reaching for it but missing somehow, like it was maybe a few inches away from where I thought it was. I picked it up and I couldn't talk...Well I could but everything was jumbled. I just couldn't think straight, nothing made sense. I had to think long and hard before speaking, and even when I did that, I couldn't finish my words. Everything was like a mumbled half syllable. I tried to get up and I fell over. I finally got up again, but I couldn't feel my hands or my feet, they were completely numb. I couldn't pick anything up or walk. I stumbled into the bathroom and tried to throw up, cause I was majorly fucking panicking at this point. I stuck my finger down my throat and I threw up a little bit-- it kind of looked like little spots of algae. I think it was from the bluish green coating of the pills. I could barely see anything...Everything was really blurry and my eyes were watering.

Then I passed out. I woke up...I have no idea how much later, in the emergency room. They were asking me questions, and I was just shaking my head and saying weird shit that didn't make sense...I can't really remember what now. They were cutting off and taking off all my necklaces, earrings, and my tongue ring. When they were taking off the necklaces, I thought it was 2 of my friends, c and s. I was trying to tell them where the clasp was on the necklace so they could take it out, but I still couldn't pronounce words, let alone see very much (except very blurilly). All I could really understand that anyone was saying, was they were telling me to drink something out of a straw. I still thought it was my friends, so I did what they said. I just kept on drinking it, and it tasted like crap, but they kept saying 'just one more sip,' so I kept on drinking it.

I think about 15 minutes later a huge wave of black swept over me. Not unconsciousness, vomit. Black vomit. I was throwing up all this black stuff, which turned out to be charcoal. My heart was too weak from all the pills for my stomach to be pumped. I fell unconscious again, and then woke up in a hospital bed. I think it was only a little while later, still night time. I'd estimate it was between 10 and 12. I had to pee, and I tried to get out of the bed, but I couldn't. I was strapped down, or attached to something, I don't know. After struggling for a few minutes, I got out of the bed and went into the bathroom. The door didn't completely close, and I thought that two of my other friends, r and c, were watching me. I was thinking 'you guys don't need to watch me pee' but I wasn't saying it out loud. I could hear it clearly as if I was, but I don't think I was. They just stared at me and didn't say anything at all. Then I got back in the bed and passed out.

I woke up the next morning and some doctor came in to show me some medical charts or something about how close I had come to dying, but I was pretty out of it. I continued to see things and people that weren't there out of the corner of my eye for several days after that. In the mental hospital, of course.

Exp Year: 2000ExpID: 5057
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jan 11, 2002Views: 41,691
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Diphenhydramine (109) : Hospital (36), Health Problems (27), Overdose (29)

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