DOSE:

75 mg

oral

Pharms - Venlafaxine

(daily)

BODY WEIGHT:

67 kg

The problem with having depression is that every few years or following major life changes, it becomes necessary to go back on antidepressants in order to get back on track, even if you don't want to (take antidepressants I mean). It's a feature of the illness that it recurs, and those who have had it will recognize the lows when they come around, and the symptoms. Manic/depression (bipolar) is very different by the way.

After a major move to a new city and a new job which turned out to be a disaster (manager has now been fired), and moving to yet another new job, I noted the depression that I'd had since age 10 firing up again. Sleepiness, teariness etc., and after 8months of trying to get over it myself, I took myself to a doctor to get some pills. I'd been on paroxetine (Aropax) as a teenager, and looked forward to feeling a bit more cheerful. However, after a few weeks I began to feel a bit like the doctor's guinea pig. First I was on a noradrenaline-reuptake-inhibitor, which gave me nightmares, and then he changed me to Effexor.

Now I'll be honest - I'm not a big one for taking illicit drugs (I don't even smoke), I've only had pot and Ecstacy, but I've never been so high in my life. I took it about three in the afternoon. That night I woke up suddenly at about four in the morning, unable to stop moving. Twitching. When I got out of bed I had the shakes, dilated pupils, my jaw was spasming and my vision was jittery. I was talking a million miles a minute, none of it making sense. I couldn't sit still. I scared my boyfriend, who wanted to know what I'd taken. He was more worried when I told him it was prescribed.

When I got to work (night shift), the chick I worked with asked me what was wrong, she saw my pupils and asked if I'd dropped before coming to work. Humiliating. Fortunately none of my patient's noticed. I filled her in and got on the internet.

I took it for a few more days, as I knew that the side effects of antidepressants take a while to settle. However, it got worse. My co-worker told me to stop taking them as I was freaking her out. I didn't sleep for four days. And didn't feel tired. But I started feeling sick. And dizzy. My jaw was aching as it never relaxed. The pupil dilation settled but my vision didn't. My arms and legs kept twitching. I felt like I had the time I overdid the Ecstacy (serotonin toxicity). I looked in the Side Effects pamphlet and on MIMS, and I had side effects that weren't published. And there were reports on the internet that people had become addicted. I didn't want to have to go through withdrawals from this stuff if this was what it was like to get acclimatised to it.

A fellow my boyfriend works with who enjoys taking drugs volunteered to take one to see what happened to him. He abstained for three or four days prior to taking it. He said it was like being on Speed, except that it doesn't wear off. The effects lasted 18hrs on him, and by the end of it even he wanted out. I promptly returned the packet to the doctor and opted out of the antidepressant idea to treat depression.

I am now on Aropax again, and getting Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. I've never been frightened for my safety, even when taking Ecstacy (because that was a choice) but I couldn't control what was happening to me. Effexor frightened me and I refused to take it. Though it may find a place on the party drug circuit.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 61283
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Sep 28, 2007	Views: 15,795
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Pharms - Venlafaxine (191) : Medical Use (47), Multi-Day Experience (13), Relationships (44), Difficult Experiences (5), Not Applicable (38)