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The Day My Brain Turned Off
Diphenhydramine
Citation:   Anonymous. "The Day My Brain Turned Off: An Experience with Diphenhydramine (exp73037)". Erowid.org. Oct 18, 2022. erowid.org/exp/73037

 
DOSE:
300 mg oral Diphenhydramine (pill / tablet)
  1 cig. smoked Tobacco - Cigarettes  
    smoked Cannabis (daily)
BODY WEIGHT: 135 lb
Diphenhydramine, a drug I have thought about doing for a few months. I am writing this report as of the day after I took these. My memory about the experience isn't all that clear and my perception of time was very bad. This is probably the most fucked up I've ever been in my life and I have been experimenting with drugs for the past 7 years. I'm writing this for me to try to understand and remember my experience better.
I'm writing this for me to try to understand and remember my experience better.
So some things I say might not make much sense. But I am explaining in the only way I can think of to fit the experience.

One day I was bored and I looked in the medicine cabinet, the first thing I saw was a box of Benadryl. I looked on the back and saw they each had 25mg of Diphenhydramine HCL and I knew I had to try them. I took the box up to my bedroom and decided I wanted to take 12. My friend R was coming over to smoke a bowl and hang out so I took the pills right before we smoked (Roughly 4pm) and began to wait for the effects to hit me. We played video games for about an hour and I began to start dropping the xbox controller. I kept forgetting it was in my hand. This is where things started to get very weird. I knew I was fucked up. I just wasn't sure how. I stopped playing video games and sat on my bed to think. I sat there for a few minutes not even thinking(looking back now it was like I just sat there and did nothing but exist for a good amount of this trip).

A few minutes go by. I'm looking around and everything is weird. I felt confused. Seconds seemed like years. I would be sitting there and it was like I was forgetting that I was there. Every time I would move it seemed like I was flinching, I know that it is not a good word to use but its all I can think of that makes sense. After I flinched I could move normally until I ended up zoning out again. At the time it didn't seem weird that I was doing that. My body felt so heavy, it reminded me of Triple C's but much more intense.

I'm talking to friends on the computer. I've been going between pacing back and forth and sitting and zoning out for a short time for the past 20 minutes. Its been an hour and a half since I took the pills. My vision is blurry and it reminds me of static on a tv. I look at the computer screen and realize I wasn't even talking to anyone, so I go back over to my bed and sit down. I'm talking to my buddy whose still playing video Games a little bit and just watching the tv. I wasn't really talking much, it was pretty hard to do seeing as I kept forgetting what I was talking about. I keep catching myself staring at the carpet, I am seeing clear lines move through it. At first I was trying to figure out what it was, but I ended up just accepting it was there.

Its been about 2 hours since I've taken these pills. That last 30 minutes were spent drifting in and out of reality. I decided I wanted to wear shorts. I grabbed a pair out of my dresser and proceeded to go downstairs to the bathroom to change. My mother was in the kitchen and she asked me what I was doing. To my surprise, I had no idea. I stood there with my mind blank for a couple seconds and she asked me if I was about to take a shower. I said no, looked around, and then I noticed my shorts and quickly said Yes. Then I walked into the bathroom and I stood there for a minute before realizing I actually came down to change my shorts. I did so and went back upstairs. After this I had no desire to speak to anyone for the rest of the experience. I get back upstairs and have a cigarette. I kept dropping it so I put it out.

This is where time no longer was a part of my mind. I feel like I was completely gone at this point. I know I can't possibly remember things in order here. Or everything that happened. But theres a few parts of this experience I can remember. I kept going from wanting to use the Computer to sitting on my bed. I was never able to actually use the computer. I kept opening up the internet and saying 'Fuck that' and walking back to sit on my bed. I definately hallucinated. I was worried I wouldn't. But I saw some really weird things. I felt really skeptical about if I was actually hallucinating or not during the trip though. I don't know if it was me not trusting the drug or a part of the side effects. It feels like the world is pulsating. There's lines in my vision. Moving black lines. When I stare at something I see dots. They move and change position. This only happens occasionaly. Sitting, staring, I finally move my eyes. I look near my dresser. I swear I saw an alien. I look away and look back but its still there. (This lasted for a while, it seems like I kept seeing it until I passed out.) Really strange things were happening now. I know that from about 2 and 1/2 hours to 3 hours into the trip I was basically sleeping with my eyes open. I sat there motionless for about 3 minutes at a time and then I would jerk to an upright sitting position. This was happening fairly consistantly for that period of time. I kept thinking I was doing things that I wasn't. At one point I picked up a video game controller and began acting like I was playing Halo 3 when actually my friend was (My friend R was still playing xbox, he had decided to hang out while I was this fucked up in case my parents found out and tried to send me to the hopsital). These were intense hallucinations. I can't even stress enough how messed up it was catching myself thinking I was doing things when I wasn't. Dreaming while I was awake, the only logical description I can give about what it was like.

I saw a lot of weird shit. There is one thing I saw that I remember though. I've been thinking about it since I came down, and I'm sure it will stay with me for a while (theres always one specific hallucination that I always seem to remember every 'trip' I've been on). At first it was eyes. Two big eyes. They consumed my vision, but at the same time I could fully see my surroundings. I was so intruiged by them. I stared into the eyes. Thin blue veins in the corners. Red surrounding the pupils. Green eyes. The pupils were black. Yet they seemed extremely bright. It was getting more vivid as time progressed. I couldn't stop staring. It kept drifting in and out of my vision now. Eventually I saw thin white eyebrows. And a small part of a nose. It makes no sense to my why I saw this. And I still keep questioning if I did.

R wanted to get some weed, its been 3 hours since I took the benadryl. I think I came down a little bit at this point, my memory is less foggy here on out. My brain was functioning enough that I was actually able to talk to R a little bit. He told me that I packed a bowl at some point and then refused to smoke it. I clearly remember him saying that, but at the same time I'm left wondering if I just thought that happened as well. Anyways, R left for about 15 minutes to get some green. The second he walked out my door I instantly was asleep until he came back. The second he opened my door I jerked up. Sounds were definitly intensified. I got woken up by my bedroom door being opened. I tried talking to R but I was just saying random shit that made no sense (apparently that happened a lot during the past few hours). I love marijuana. I've smoked it almost every day for a good 5+ years. But once again, the second time today, and probably in a few years, that I said no to smoking weed.
I love marijuana. I've smoked it almost every day for a good 5+ years. But once again, the second time today, and probably in a few years, that I said no to smoking weed.
After that I went to sleep for about an hour, when I woke up I felt mostly sober.

Its been more than 24 hours since I came down. My vision is still kind of weird and occasionaly sudden movement is making me flinch. All the other effects are basically gone. The was the strangest high of my life. I can't stop thinking about it. I'm still trying to figure out what things I remember were real and what were actually my mind messing with me.

For me it really was a unique experience and I definitly plan to try this again at a higher dose.

Exp Year: 2008ExpID: 73037
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 18, 2022Views: 584
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Diphenhydramine (109) : Small Group (2-9) (17), First Times (2)

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