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I Lost the Magic, But I Keep Coming Back
MDMA (Ecstasy)
Citation:   Anonymous. "I Lost the Magic, But I Keep Coming Back: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp78285)". Erowid.org. Apr 23, 2009. erowid.org/exp/78285

 
DOSE:
  repeated   MDMA
I have done ecstasy over 30 times in my life and I am only 15. My first time was amazing! I tried it for the first time when I was 13 and I loved it. So, I kept doing it. But, after about 10 times, I couldn't get that rolling feeling anymore. I would feel good and have all the side effects of a good ecstasy pill but I still couldn't get that good old fashion roll. So all it is right now is a waste of money. But the question is, if it doesn't give me the high I want, why do I keep doing it? They say ecstasy isn't addictive, but I struggle with this problem everyday. I can't go one day without thinking about it. Pretty much everything triggers me. And when these triggers interact with me, I get these REALLY INTENSE cravings and I just can't seem to fight them. It is extremely hard. To tell you the truth, it's not worth it...

Exp Year: 2008ExpID: 78285
Gender: Not Specified 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Apr 23, 2009Views: 8,146
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MDMA (3) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Loss of Magic (34), Addiction & Habituation (10), Not Applicable (38)

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