REPORT: D.M.T. EXPERIENCE (1961)
DMT
From Stolaroff Collection
Citation: Al M. Hubbard. "REPORT: D.M.T. EXPERIENCE (1961): An Experience with DMT (exp78447)". Erowid.org. Apr 30, 2009. erowid.org/exp/78447
DOSE: T+ 0:00 |
0.5 ml | IM | DMT | (liquid) |
T+ 0:54 | 1.0 ml | IM | DMT | (liquid) |
T+ 1:55 | 0.5 ml | IM | DMT | (liquid) |
[letterhead header]
D. C. MacDonald, M.D.
Vancouver 9, B.C.
Regent 3-8219
REPORT
D.M.T. EXPERIENCE
Dr. A. M. Hubbard
Thursday, March 23rd, 1961
Time: 1.40 p.m.
Gave ½ cc of D.M.T. injection in left deltoid muscle.
1.40½ p.m. sat down on chesterfield in the therapy room.
1.41 p.m. nil to report.
1.42 p.m. an increasing uprising of consciousness and awareness.
Dr. Hubbard: 'If you resist it it could be very disconcerting, non resistance is important. This is half of what I took in Ontario. It should have a graduated effect to allow the subject to accommodate themselves to it'.
1.46 p.m. (5 minutes) 'Very effective now -- a rising of consciousness. An increasing awareness of colour -- very rapid -- much more than L.S.D. Five times as pronounced -- very beautiful though'.
Dr. MacDonald: 'How about with eyes closed?'.
Dr. Hubbard- (at once closes eyes)
1.47 p.m. 'Flashing stars and a deep network of blue -- very intricate design, spirals interwoven with spirals. A complete LSD world as we normally visualize it.
'Flashing stars and a deep network of blue -- very intricate design, spirals interwoven with spirals. A complete LSD world as we normally visualize it.
3½ minutes:
Dr. MacDonald: 'Any particular symbology?'.
Dr. Hubbard: 'Now I am seeing a great green speckled dome, a ¼ dome changing very rapidly -- extremely beautiful, a valve of colour. Image and time are faster than LSD time -- You have to be faster to capture their contrasts. Shock would be quite pronounced to a patient who resisted it'.
1.48 ½ 'The designs resemble Aztec designs -- beautiful fish but without any flesh on them -- a fish skeleton. Beautiful streams of colour, very friendly. A pull sideways in time towards back -- from back of head -- a pull backwards -- not imaginary -- as if a wind were blowing.
1.50 p.m. Enormous realization -- all the muscles [relaxing].
1.51 p.m. 'A spinning glove [globe?] -- just spinning. [Except] for fast onset so rapid and surprising it's plain LSD. The room is far brighter, everything has enormous clarity. Your face is kindly -- (aside to Dr. MacDonald). Considerable detachment unless you wish to focus your attention. Picture of Christ on Cross viewed on the opposite wall -- You can walk into it with great ease'.
18 minutes 'They are projections of ourselves -- project the most perfect part of us -- then proceed to worship it. Extremely beautiful picture. The Cross separates entirely from---------?
The man on the Cross is completely at peace with himself. (Picture of Christ on the Cross). He wasn't afraid to begin with'.
1.54 p.m. 'This dose -- I could drive with it by carefully [relaxing ]myself. It's more pleasant to accept it -- yourself'.
1.55 p.m. Effects are holding their own. (Yawns) Everything is friendly -- the walls -- the table -- everything -- of course it's the way they always are (Yawns three times). It has about the same relaxant power as the former dose'. (Laughs) -- great empathy with you with no trouble whatsoever. Some self reflexion regarding personality by Dr. Hubbard. Extremely beautiful -- more potent than psylocybin. Effects are passing now'.
1.56 p.m. If one resisted it it could be extremely vicious -- no unpleasant physiological symptoms.
If one resisted it it could be extremely vicious -- no unpleasant physiological symptoms.
1.59 p.m. A waning of it now ----- 19 minutes.
2.01 p.m. (no music)
Dr. Hubbard: 'That limb and the blossom screen is in complete 3 D. (Looks at a screen 6 feet away). Extremely friendly. That gold is a good background (screen). It's people's fears that cause them to distort it. (much yawning)
2.02 p.m. 'The screen is dark again -- blue --
24 minutes 'Different than before -- the light is gone out. It lasts about 30 minutes. The [relaxation] remains complete. A natural for meditation. It might be useful to use this as an introduction to LSD due to the relaxation it produces, say, with tense people -- You wouldn't get the pentothal relaxation'.
2.06 p.m. Psychiatry with great success if you chose patient carefully.
28 minutes
30 minutes -- (Back to normal) We discussed the possible value of music. 'I'll see if I can create music -- even now, he tries to he cannot.
Dr Hubbard appears to be back to former conversant self in exactly 30 minutes.
A dose 1 cc at end of one hour to be given.
Dr. Hubbard spoke regarding Gerald Heard and this material.
'A sense of gratitude -- a big wonderful responsibility regarding being able to use these materials.
A sense of gratitude -- a big wonderful responsibility regarding being able to use these materials.
2.17 p.m. Dr. Hubbard is very relaxed -- smiling.
'Lamps and pictures are standing out so clearly. (outlines of objects). He spoke regarding Dr. Janiger of Los Angeles. 'It should raise your empathy with a patient ten times.' Dr. Hubbard feels D.M.T. would be very valuable in psychiatry. Dr. Hubbard felt empathy to me (Dr. MacDonald) -- to an increased degree. 'Even your bones feel good; Dr. MacDonald.
2.24 p.m. Discourse D.M.T. easily made. Emphasis on letting go mentioned by Dr. Hubbard. This is in a faster time than the other materials.
2.30 p.m. No blurring of edges of objects like in LSD.
4 minutes later
2.34 p.m. 2nd injection 1 cc of D.M.T. given.
2.36 p.m. nil to report
2.36 ½ p.m. (2½ minutes) -- It's coming on all right.
2.37 3 minutes. Any resistance could be converted into a negative thing. The force of the onset is fifty times the pressure before -- with a higher level.
4 minutes 'They talk about being forced through -- closes eyes -- how -- how (They talk -- ( An expression of peace on Dr. Hubbard's face).
2.38 ½ (Dr. Hubbard opens eyes again -- looks at sun symbol)
(A symbol over our treatment door).
2.39 p.m. 'It's easily 50 times the strength of before'. This is your own mind. (smiles) A look of wonderment noted on Dr. Hubbard's face.
2.40 p.m. Smiles again -- breathes deeply -- 'My oh my' -- My oh my'.
(closes eyes -- head sinks on breast).
2.41 p.m. Sighs deeply -- an appearance of deep meditation observed.
6 minutes elapsed.
2.42½ p.m. Eyes still closed.
2.43 p.m. Breathes deeply -- a half smile -- sighs deeply -- smiles
breathes more deeply -- relaxed appearance.
(11 minutes)
2.45 p.m. No verbal communication for 3 minutes now (smiles happily)
Breathes very deeply -- sighs deeply -- smiles -- sighs deeply.
'More powerful than LSD, any resistance would be like fighting a monster.
(14 minutes)
2.47 p.m. 'How silly we are: how we cut ourselves off'.
'The masses have to learn it slowly -- Wonderful! Wonderful! Wonderful!
During second injection experience (1 cc)
2.48 p.m.
(17 min.) Much higher realizations than after first injection. 'Maybe this is the way we were meant to live, I don't know. (Reclines back against couch) (yawns) 'What a wonderful world!
Dr. MacDonald: 'Any new dimensions compared to LSD?'.
Dr. Hubbard: 'No-----oneness --- everything'. 'We make our devils and they laugh at us. -- smiles -- My! Oh, my! It's wonderful, delicious -- very relaxing -- [every] bone -----
'We make our devils and they laugh at us. -- smiles -- My! Oh, my! It's wonderful, delicious -- very relaxing -- [every] bone -----
2.51 p.m. 'You're as you should be'. 'Probably self healing should be able to occur under this material. The idea comes strongly. Why are we so dumb? This is the most wonderful thing man has created. What shall I say man has created?'.
2.54 p.m. 'This is the soul expressing itself -- that's why resistance is so painful.
(18 minutes) My the beauty --- my! Oh my! ---- The landscapes --worlds without end --- no end -- we made everyone of them. Why did we isolate ourselves for? This is your home'.
2.55 p.m. I'm completely at home. What the hell do we want to resist for? The dragons people make -- , then fear them -- none of us reverence them. This would be worth a million dollars to you'.
20 minutes 'Now they are going away -- (yawns) (not really though). Old Al is going to be back all right -- You don't frighten this big thing'.
3.05 p.m. (Dr. MacDonald left to see a patient for a 50 minute interval).
Third injection
3.35 -- ½ cc in deltoid muscle.
3.50 (15 min. later)
Dr. MacDonald: 'How is it?'.
Dr. Hubbard: 'It acts as a bridge'. You're thrown out beyond former comprehension, a timeless level, above the reasoning context -- forever and forever. Life is so beautiful -- so wonderful -- I searched the Universe for why we acted this way. I couldn't find it, it was a great disappointment.
3.52 p.m. 'Truth is forever'. -- very little feeling from this 3rd. injection -- the second threw me so far out -- further than anywhere I had ever been. The scenes are pure LSD scenes but somehow you're beyond the scenes. How strange we project our idea of goodness outside, then worship it. Inside is everywhere -- We are giants. The mind is a giant beyond your imagining. Our words are futile little things'.
Dr. Hubbard: 'What you are you're wholly responsible'. This experience will stay with you.
3.57 p.m. 'I know you could do it, Dr. MacDonald'. I realized the futility of arguing with people'.
The above discussion since 3.50 p.m. concerns the total experience of D.M.T.
'Our phoniness stinks. I got quite beyond the ordinary LSD experience. This throws you physically into it -- you are ripped to your essential self -- you can't resist it -- a maniacal force. I saw great stars turning in their courses. When you speak of right and wrong you speak to an empty universe. I think this would be another plateau of achievement to teach use of D.M.T.
Comments after third injection.
4.05 p.m. Dr Hubbard: 'The most intense experience I ever had. No side effects from it at all -- no heavy lethargic thing at all. This thing hits straight at the ego. One Med. student said: 'This is pure LSD on a level we never hit before'. 'I believe this is correct'.
4.05 p.m. This suffuses you on all sides and says -- Just know yourself. It is so terribly intense. Right now it would be impossible to rouse any rancor of any kind. At death the ego is dissolved. It seemed an awfully lot like death. Old Al. Hubbard was gone. (The personality I maintain as myself). This thing reminds you of something maniacal the way it strips it from you. You're almost dead to yourself. The room is warm and kindly. You're stripped bare -- There's no hallucinations to it at all -- You're fired right through this. All pretense is gone. A wonderful preparation for transition. (death). All this negativity is something we're putting on oneself. I saw demoniac forces -- dragons -- this stuff brushes all that aside like an edict. A higher step in consciousness.
No ill effects afterward.
[signed]
D. C. MacDonald MD
Psychiatrist
Exp Year: 1961 | ExpID: 78447 |
Gender: Male | |
Age at time of experience: Not Given | |
Published: Apr 30, 2009 | Views: 38,849 |
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