DOSE:

3 hits

smoked

Salvia divinorum

(extract - 10x)

BODY WEIGHT:

124 lb

So I had heard about Salvia thur a cannibis forum as it is legal, and is said to have spirtual effects. I am very into meditation and thought I would like to experience it. I bought an ounce of 10x, and tried about two hits in the afternoon while snacking.

All of the sudden any part of my body that was touching something (i.e. the couch, the cheeto I was holding) felt like it was tingling and melting into the object. I then heard a voice tell me that I should open my mouth and it felt like someone had put like a sternum type thing in my mouth and was slowly opening it forcing my mouth to open, I could even feel the pressure on my teeth.

I fought it and thought to myself that I wanted to eat but I couldn't close my mouth and just ended up drooling on myself which I thought was hilarious so I started laughing which came out sounding like a hiss. I must have been loud because my husband came into the bedroom and started laughing. I thought I tried to yell at him that he was not alowed to laugh only I could but it came out as slurs which mad me laugh some more which made my husband laugh harder which completely snapped me out of it.

Later on that evening after we had put my daughter to bed I decided I wanted to go for round #2. My husband was watching Saturday Night Live and I started to light up, thinking I better do it now cause I knew he'd be passed out soon. I took one hit and held it in for about 10 sec and felt a slight tingle, and while still tingling I took an even bigger hit which made my lungs burn so I knew it must have been strong.

I was ready to put down the can and start my meditation (which I do to relax myself and can often tune out everything around me), but my attention focused on me sinking into the couch. I looked up at the T.V. And it was weekend update on Saturday Night Live, I recognized Zach Effron and someone else. The longer I stared at the television I noticed that there were lines coming off of it, not like solid lines, but say you were to cut a picture and if you were to put those strips back together there would be a whole picture (((((TV)))))<---- Like that.

The lines/strips falling away from the T.V. were going in a circle back around to me, and it was those lines that were covering me up. Overlapping my reality so to say. There was a sentence that kept repeating in my head, it was almost like a voice telling me to repeat the sentence, I didn't want to because I wanted to relax, so I started to take deep breaths repeating to myself just relax. The voice was still talking over my thoughts so I knew I couldn't be 'thinking the voice up in my head'.

I tried to force myself to relax and then the two characters on the t.v. told me to stop. They told me that they made up my world and that I would do what they wanted. They told me that my reality was ending, and I said that's fine, and was going to let their reality finish covering me when for some reason I can't remember why I started to panic.

I remember standing up and walking to the kitchen but looking backwards and being right in front of the T.V. and I could see the two people talking to each other and Zach Effron says 'Are we murdering her since technically she never existed?' And I tried to tell them I did exist and I knew I had to get out of there. I yelled at the t.v. that I had a daughter and my maternal instinct was to go in and look on her, but I didn't want to see her melt away.

I just knew I had to get out of the house or else my reality would be over. I ran to the patio door and tried to open the door and couldn't get it open, so I ran to the front door and tried to unlock it which I thought I had but it wouldn't budge, I started to be very frightened and ran back to the patio struggling to open the door, but felt like the door was locking itself, the whole time refusing to look at the television.

Finally I was able to open the patio door but didn't make it outside because I realised I could not jump over the privacy wall, I saw the night sky and saw my freedom but I couldn't get to it and felt like I wanted to cry. Frantically with my mind racing I ran to the garage and tried to lift the door that didn't lock thinking to myself that I had taken something and my mind was playing tricks on me and that I had to get away. When I saw I couldn't open it all I could think was that I wanted to exist, with that I managed to fling it open.

There I was in one of those 'beach dresses' the long ones with no shoulders, bare foot, and running down the sidewalk looking for some form of life. I remember thinking I should run faster because I didn't need to breath, there was a sentence that kept running through my head and I wanted it to stop, so I decided to prove myself wrong and concentrate on breathing. A little ways up the street, I saw a car and it had its tail lights on, so I ran towards it when I saw a little boy get out (I was skeptical because it was so late) and I thought to myself that if he aknowledged me then I must exist, so I yell at him, 'Hey is that your house' and he turns around and looks at me, and I'm like never mind and decide it was safe to go back home.

I am feeling lost but I know I'm not I have to just stop and think. Then I see the sidewalk that leads to the park next to my house, I see a huge empty field but can't see the park or the big pig pinic areas, instead I see trees in the spot where the park is supposed to be. I think to myself that's fine I'll just run home I'm really close. So I am jogging home and realize I look a hot ass mess, barefoot , hair all over my head, and in a dress. I try and compose myself and make it look like I had lesiurely jog around the block.

I don't remember going inside my house but I remember needing to take a shower and wash my hair, as I feel the water hit me, I feel it not just hitting my skin, but it feels like sand is coming out of the shower and the heat from the sand/water is from the friction of it hitting my skin. I wasn't sure if I had been outside but the bottom of my feet hurt. I was so devastated because I remember thinking, this is god's way of telling me I don't exist and I wanted to cry, or maybe this is what happens when you die. I remember wanting to accept it (death/alternate reality) but thinking about my family and how I was scared to lose/leave them.

After it wore off completely I went to check on my little one, halfway expecting her not to be there. My husband came in, and was like uhh where did you go. I thought it was funny that I did not think about him or miss him while I was on my 'trip'.

He said I was sitting there with the bong in my hand leaning forward and leaning back a bunch of times, then just flopping back and hunching over, then I jumped to my feet and started saying 'but I have a daughter, I won't say that because I have a daughter' and started running to all the doors. He thought he had locked all the doors so he just watched me run to each one until he heard the garage door open and by the time he got there I was gone. He said he went to look for me and when he got home I was in the shower so he figured I was ok.

I just looked at him and said, how the fuck is this shit legal ?!?!? I mean seriously, all I do when I smoke weed is sit on my ass laugh at T.V. and eat snacks, but this shit had me running through the neghiborhood like a fucking crazy person.

I would like to say that I would never do Salvia again. But I did it wrong. I read that I should be in absolute silence or darkness, that mild music was allowed, and completely relaxed, not watching Saturday Night Live, and bored as hell...... LESSON LEARNED!!

Although I am not sure if I will be doing it again, I will have my husband guinea pig the RIGHT way to do it.....

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 78971
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jan 9, 2020	Views: 727
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Salvia divinorum (44) : Difficult Experiences (5), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)