DOSE:

0.33 g

smoked

Salvia divinorum

(extract)

BODY WEIGHT:

145 lb

Some background:

I had ordered salvia 20x extract from the most commonly referred to site I could find. I had read all the tips (use a torch lighter, a wooden pipe, hold it in for 20-30 seconds, etc). I had done it once before, and remembered the feeling. I had read all the reviews of this mystical plant the internet had to offer; everything from the guy who claimed to have been a blue table in a bowling alley for 2 years to the several reports of meeting a mysterious female “spirit”. I had made plans with two friends, who we’ll call J and M, to smoke it one weekend. J had to cancel at the last minute, but M and I decided to go ahead with the plan.
On my first trip, which was more than a year before this one, I had been in a tranquil dream-like state. I had fallen immediately into my bed, and had awoken in a room whose walls were strange, bright colors. Then the walls had begun to crumple up like used tin foil and reveal a new layer beneath it. This happened several times. At first I had been watching the events from away from my body, but somehow knew that it was me in that room. Then my viewpoint got closer and closer until finally I was viewing it from my own body. Then it stopped, and I woke up to the real world.

This had been my first trip, and it was pleasant enough. But absolutely nothing could have prepared me for what was to come.
M insisted that I go first, which was fine with me. I was anxiously awaiting my next visit to the melting-wall room, which was my name for it, or wherever else this mystical plant might take me. I packed a bowl (around 1/3 of the gram that I had) and went to the window over my couch. The window was open a little bit so that I could exhale out of it, put the pipe on the table next to the couch, and then collapse. I put my torch lighter to the bowl and began to inhale. I took a large breath and held it as long as I could, finally releasing it. I didn’t feel anything immediately the way I had the first time, and the way M had in the times that they had done it (three times before this one), so I took another hit. Again, I held it in, but before I could count to 5 I felt the almost-familiar feeling that can only be described as “I need to put down this pipe and then go off into the crumple room”. In my last fleeting moments of sobriety I tried to tell M that yes, it had hit me. I tried to point to M and say something, but I had already collapsed into my couch, and thus into a new world.

The next part is not as clear to me as my first trip was. I can remember being in what I can only define as a happy place, where there was no anxiety, no fear, and nothing to worry about. And that’s exactly how I felt. Above this place was a presence, which became more defined later. But for now, I was vaguely aware of it. I was vaguely aware of anything. This place was two-dimensional, and I was again viewing myself from outside of my body. I eventually merged with my body again, only to have my viewpoint dramatically altered again as the presence above the place became more defined. My viewpoint zoomed out to see a giant figure in the sky. Then out of this figure came an arm, which reached down and lifted me, and I somehow knew that this was a female, motherly figure. And I felt at peace.

Somewhere in here, according to M, I got up and walked around a little bit, sat back down, and tried to talk. I don’t remember this. I do remember having my trip interrupted by M, who was asking me what I was trying to say, and if I wanted a pencil to write it down. To this I responded very sarcastically “shut up!” (I suppose I knew how absurd I must have appeared). I then remember going back to the motherly figure in the sky for a short period of time before I began seeing “reality” again. This started a new trip. The beginnings of this new trip are not clear to me, but I remember seeing my dog across the room and saying “dog” out loud, standing up, and walking over to my dog. My mind had become convinced that my life, and everyone’s life, was fake. All the characters were fake, and somehow I had awoken in the “real” world.

I had read experiences where people had similar epiphanies, but I could not comprehend how they always said that this was a “comforting” feeling. But as I sat there, petting my dog and feeling quite convinced that none of this was real, I too felt comforted by this idea. Nothing mattered, because nothing was real. Every person was a slot in a mailbox, with their own fake life going on, not realizing that it was fake. Even they were fake, because this was my life and only I existed. Again, this was a comforting thought. I made my way back to the couch and sat down again. M tried talking to me, and I was able to have a conversation, though my mind was still very much psychoactive. M’s hair was turning different colors and I was unaware of what we were talking about, though somehow I was able to keep talking coherently.

After a few minutes, we decided that I was sober enough to watch M take a hit and make sure everything was ok. I did so and continued having “mini-trips”, which were more mental than visual. I kept having very deep thoughts that swallowed my surroundings, though I was able to keep alert enough to keep an eye on M.

M did not take as much as I had, so M’s trip was shorter and not as profound. Even after all noticeable visual effects had worn off, I still felt very…happy. I do not believe that there are many people who can feel as I did then: happy for no reason at all. Not happy as in “perky” or like the people who are “always happy”, but rather more like I just felt like everything was right in the world, nothing terrible could happen. The best way to describe it would be like the guy from “Office Space” after visiting the therapist. That was me. And for a good couple of hours after my trip had ended, I still felt this way. Life had a new meaning, and it was good. This is the not-so-often mentioned “after-glow” of salvia. This was a very mellow, very happy kind of come-down.

Since that trip, I’ve been a noticeably happier person, and while I cannot say that it will have this effect for everyone (I know some people have bad trips), it certainly acted like an anti-depressant, even though I wasn’t depressed. Everything seems brighter, food tastes better, music sounds more enchanting. Everything is more enjoyable. Part of me does not want to do this again, in case it reverses these effects. But another part of me wants to know more about this motherly figure in the sky and understand the feelings I had when I “learned” that reality was a lie. I will wait, and when the time is right, hopefully I will be able to better comprehend my world, and I want to ask, in the words of mighty Ziltoid the Omniscient, 'Tell me the true nature of my reality!'

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 81015
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: Oct 18, 2022	Views: 736
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Salvia divinorum (44) : Entities / Beings (37), Glowing Experiences (4), Small Group (2-9) (17)