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Saving My Life With a Few Painfree Moments
Oxycodone IR
Citation:   David. "Saving My Life With a Few Painfree Moments: An Experience with Oxycodone IR (exp81232)". Erowid.org. Mar 26, 2020. erowid.org/exp/81232

 
DOSE:
100 mg oral Oxycodone (daily)
BODY WEIGHT: 220 lb
[Erowid Note: Because opiate use can lead to significant tolerance (requiring higher doses for the same effects), the dose used by a first time user is significantly smaller than that used by a regular user. It can be extremely dangerous to choose ones dose on the basis of the amount taken by someone else. Overdoses of opiates can be fatal.]
After an injury followed by a surgery mishap left me with chronic pain I tried everything I could to control it, as it slowly took over my life. Imagine being tortured every moment of every day. It's worse than anything I could have imagined before it happened. I smoked pot, which worked surprisingly well, but I didn't like being stoned all the time because I couldn't get anything done in my life (couldn't work, couldn't read, couldn't even have a conversation), so that didn't last.

I was given codeine originally (after the surgery, just for healing, not for chronic pain), and at first this worked. The first few times I took it, in a very small quantity (30mg, a few times a day), I got a nice warm opiate buzz, but this didn't last as I built up a tolerance quickly. My pain is partially neuropathic and partially 'real'. I found that the opiates took away the 'real' pain entirely, and took the edge off the neuropathic pain. Unfortunately the pain grew over time, in addition to my tolerance. The doctors suggested that I go back to smoking pot, which I didn't want to do because I like being clear-headed, and tried Lyrica, anti-depressants with off-label pain control possibilities, and other things, but nothing worked that I had tried other than the codeine they originally prescribed, as well as percocets and oxycontin and oxycodone that friends had given me.

I managed to keep getting codeine, but because I had no regular prescription I likely made my pain worse by going on and off of the painkillers. Eventually a doctor gave me a regular oxycodone prescription, starting with 30mg daily (in the form of 5mg percocet six times a day), and then over time moving to 100mg daily (oxy-ir) as the quantity grew to protect my liver.

There is no 'fun' effect at this point -- I wish there was, because the warm, secure feeling of being high on opiates is indescribably wonderful (especially to a person in pain). However, the sensation of having the pain 'flow' out of me as the drug kicks in is wonderful in its own way as I escape from the pain that I live with far too constantly (I am quite jealous when I read other people describing how good Oxy makes them feel and wish it did that for me -- not that I'm complaining about 'just' having the pain disappear). When I am on oxycodone, even on larger amounts (in an ideal world I would take 150mg per day, but I am underprescribed) I find that I am more alert with clearer thinking, have faster reflexes, and feel more 'like myself'. Without the oxycodone I am completely debilitated by pain, unable to live my life as I want to.
Without the oxycodone I am completely debilitated by pain, unable to live my life as I want to.
But on the drug I can study and read, do physical work, and live like a normal person instead of a person imprisoned by pain. I have had no negative side effects after years of heavy use other than a greatly reduced sex drive (but this might be the pain).

The biggest problem that I have faced is that doctors treat me like a drug addict, and talking to others in pain treatment programs, this is a common problem. They assume first that we are there trying to score drugs and are lying about our pain (even in cases like mine where there is an obvious physical cause), and because of it, we have to really fight to get the treatment we need, and it can be quite humiliating and degrading to beg, promising that we're not just there to get high. I take opiates not to feel good... I take them just to stop the pain. It's amazing and disturbing the lack of compassion I and many other people face trying to get treatment for our pain. It's cruel. It's very unfortunate that just because there are some 'abusers' we have created a system where people in pain are forced to suffer even more.

Oxycodone has been a life saver for me, and without it I would have killed myself to escape the constant pain.



Exp Year: 2009ExpID: 81232
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 33
Published: Mar 26, 2020Views: 2,401
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Oxycodone (176) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Medical Use (47), Not Applicable (38)

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