The Gold Realm and White Room of Crucifixion
Amanita muscaria
Citation: Space Elf. "The Gold Realm and White Room of Crucifixion: An Experience with Amanita muscaria (exp87567)". Erowid.org. Dec 25, 2012. erowid.org/exp/87567
DOSE: |
30 g | oral | Amanitas - A. muscaria | (dried) |
10 g | oral | Amanitas - A. muscaria | (dried) |
BODY WEIGHT: | 150 lb |
Trip Report #1
Back in the Spring of 2007 I purchased a quarter pound of Amanita muscaria caps from an online ethnobotanical vendor. For several days I experimented with different doses of these mushrooms. I had previously read reports of a mystical realm one enters after ingesting a very high dose of Amanita muscaria. My intent was to access this realm thus I continued to take increasingly higher doses each day. I failed to access this realm consecutively for two days in a row. Each time I ate around 20 dry grams but I always ended up vomiting and falling into a deep sleep.
By the third day and third attempt to access this mystical realm I was determined to succeed. My supply of Amanita caps was beginning to run out. I waited until close to sunset to begin my journey. I weighed out 30 dry grams and proceeded to eat a few large caps. After eating three caps in a row, the nausea began to effect me and the urge to vomit became overpowering. I realized I would not be able to eat anymore thus I decided to consume the rest in the form of tea. I ground the remaining caps into a powder and boiled them in water on my stove-top. The water quickly turned a deep reddish brown color. After boiling the tea for about 15 minutes I poured the liquid through a mesh metal filter to separate the mushroom material from the tea. I then drank the tea very quickly after which I layed down and waited for the tea to take effect.
At this point, the first caps I ate had already begun to take effect. The first visual effects I noticed was that colors became brighter and the size of objects became distorted. I looked down at my hand and it appeared to be very small and very far away from my face. I perceived what appeared to be transparent energy flowing through the air in a swirling pattern. I felt very tired and somewhat delirious. My body felt almost weightless as if I was floating. I then experienced the sensation of slowly leaving my body through the top of my head. The tea I consumed gave me an intense urge to vomit. I managed to resist vomiting although it was incredibly difficult to do so.
The next sensation I experienced was the loss of feeling in my body. I became dissociated and could barely feel my feet on the ground. This is when I began losing visual contact with reality. It seemed as though I was going blind. I could barely make out the objects in my field of vision. They were slowly disappearing on me. Suddenly the negative side-effects of profuse sweating and extreme salivation began to occur. My clothes quickly became drenched from my sweat. Saliva was pouring out of my mouth very rapidly. I layed down on my bed at which point I experienced extreme muscle twitching. The muscles all over my body were contracting uncontrollably. This is the last thing I remember before I fell into a deep sleep.
I don't know how long I was in this deep sleep for. Upon awakening I witnessed the incredible transition from this realm into another. Imagine a clock with only one hand on it at the 12 o'clock position. Now imagine the hand of the clock going all the way around and back to the 12 o'clock position. This is how the transition occurred. Reality elegantly folded like the hand on a clock. As it made it's way back to the 12 o'clock position a gold realm was left in it's wake. In other words, when the hand was at the 6 o'clock position there was a gold reality on the right side of my visual field and normal reality on the left side which quickly disappeared altogether.
With the disappearance of reality my body also disappeared. I was left as a floating consciousness in a gold realm. I immediately realized that there was an object in this gold dimension. In front of me, there was a sphere hovering in mid-air which was the same gold color as the realm itself. My initial reaction was one of fear and panic. The thought that I had died crossed my mind. I struggled to make sense of what I was experiencing.
After about an hour the gold dimension began to disappear. This is when I remembered that I had taken Amanita muscaria. I realized that the experience I was having was the result of consuming these mushrooms. After the gold realm faded out of my perception, I found myself in a similar realm but instead of gold, everything was white. I looked down and could see my hands and only my hands. I watched as my arms slowly began to reappear from the same emanating point where my hands first came back into my field of vision. Slowly my body began to reappear. I felt as though I was being reborn. After several hours the white realm began to give way to normal reality and I found myself back in the normal universe.
Trip Report #2
The following experience occurred yesterday morning on October 2, 2010. The past few days I had gone out picking Amanita amerimuscarias (Amanita muscaria var. formosa). I had collected a couple pounds of them around pine trees. The first amanitas I picked were dried over night in front of a space heater. I then completed the drying process by curing the mushrooms in the oven at 175°F to convert the ibotenic acid into muscimol, the psychedelic compound of Amanita muscaria. Yesterday morning I decided to try out the amanitas to determine their potency. I didn't plan on tripping at all. I intended on taking 10 dry grams solely for sleep aid purposes. This turned out to be a huge mistake. I completely underestimated the potency of these mushrooms which resulted in the most terrifying and probably the most physically painful experience of my life.
Before going to bed I weighed out 10 dry grams of amanita caps. I crushed up the amanitas and made tea out of them the same way I did in the previous trip report. I consumed the tea and waited about an hour. The effects were very subtle and hardly noticeable. I concluded that the mushrooms were far from potent and then I went to sleep.
I awoke from my sleep several hours later in extreme physical pain! I was horrified by what was happening. I found myself out of my body in a white realm with a red circle below me. I immediately began screaming from the pain and horror of my sudden realization that I somehow died and was in Hell. The pain was unbearable. I was screaming and pleading with God to release me from this eternal state of loneliness and physical pain. I had no idea that I was experiencing a different version of the Amanita muscaria breakthrough. I didn't detect any noticeable difference in my state of consciousness. I felt completely sober.
In reality, I must've been flailing my arms and legs about but I wasn't aware that even had a body. Every time I swung my invisible arms and legs I heard a 'ch' sound. With each swing of my invisible arms and legs, the red circle below me became a little bit bigger. I realized that I had to continue making this circle continuously grow bigger in order to free myself, or at least that is what I hoped to accomplish. With every swing of my arms and legs, the pain in my invisible wrists and feet became excruciatingly more intense. It felt like there were nails piercing my wrists and feet and that the 'ch' sound was caused by me pounding the nails out of something. I couldn't see any nails or what they were attached to.
For over an hour I was frantically pounding these invisible nails out of my wrists and feet in order to make the red circle grow larger. The whole time I was screaming at the top of my lungs in pain. I kept asking God to forgive me for everything wrong I had done in my life. After what felt like eternity the red circle turned into something I could recognize. It was the wooden panels in my bedroom floor. A huge feeling of relief came over me. It was at this point that everything started to make sense. I realized I had unintentionally experienced a breakthrough from the mushroom tea. I also realized at this point that the experience I was having was a simulation of Jesus Christ's crucifixion. I understood that I had to keep pounding these nails out of an invisible cross which I was nailed to. I would be free once the task was completed.
I estimate that it was only another 15 minutes of being nailed to the cross that I finally knocked the first nail out of my right wrist. I didn't see any nail fall out. I clearly heard a 'tink, tink, tink' sound of a nail hitting my wooden floor. With one arm free I proceeded to rip my other hand and feet free. There was one invisible nail in each wrist and one in each foot, 4 in all. Each time I knocked an invisible nail out, I heard it hit my floor. With my escape from the invisible cross, my bedroom began to come back into my perception. I began crying from the happiness of having escaped this Hellish experience and due to the gratitude I had for getting another chance at life.
Conclusion
These experiences were the most profound life-changing events of my life. I'm very grateful for these experiences even though they were inexplicably traumatic. I will never be the same again. If you think what I experienced sounds fun, you are gravely mistaken. I don't advise anyone to attempt replicating these experiences. I wrote this trip report in order to prevent anyone from making the same mistakes I did. For anyone who wants to experiment with Amanita muscaria, be very careful in terms of dosage. As I found out, the potency of amanitas is highly variable and unpredictable. It is impossible to convey the seriousness of what I went through. Words do not do justice in articulating these experiences.
Prior to having my first Amanita muscaria experience, I read theories which postulate that the Sacrament of Jesus Christ, his Flesh and Blood, was a symbolic reference to the Amanita muscaria mushroom. It is believed that Jesus and his disciples used Amanita muscaria for religious significance. Many paintings typically portray Jesus and his disciples with a gold ball or halo behind their heads and sometimes in a gold room. After my first breakthrough experience I became a believer in the use of Amanita muscaria as the Sacrament of Christ. My second breakthrough confirmed my belief. Although I was raised as a Christian, I began to reject the truth of this religion during my adolescence. At the very least, these experiences showed me that Jesus must've been more than just an average spiritual teacher. I am now certain that there is more truth to Christianity than I had assumed. Thanks for reading.
Exp Year: 2010 | ExpID: 87567 |
Gender: Not Specified | |
Age at time of experience: Not Given | |
Published: Dec 25, 2012 | Views: 50,594 |
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Amanitas - A. muscaria (70) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Alone (16) |
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