DOSE: T+ 0:00	1 bowl	smoked	Tagetes lucida
T+ 0:00	10 g	oral	Syrian Rue	(capsule)
T+ 2:00	120 mg	buccal	Tetrahydroharmine
T+ 2:05	5 g	oral	Mimosa tenuiflora	(extract)

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

This took place 48hrs ago.

Well, everyone who said I needed more RIMA and less MHRB was right! First, not sure if this made a difference, but I smoked a cone of tarragon (T. Lucida) which is said to potentiate other visionary plants. Then I ground up 10g of syrian rue and swallowed the gelcaps (I can't stand teas...)... and I waited, to see if I could feel just the rue. Two hours passed and I felt next to nothing, although there were various disturbances including a new dog in the house peeing and pooping and needing a walk etc. I had a gram of THH lying around, so I took about 120mg of it and just held it in my mouth, just in case the rue had already worn off or wasn't absorbed in my digestion. After maybe 5 minutes of holding the THH under my tongue (I've read that sublingual absorption is much better for harmalas), I took 5g of crude (IPA) extracted MHRB in capsules (so maybe it was more like the equiv of 15 or 20g MHRB--in terms of volume, it was 10 size 0 caps... I think). I then had some animal crackers, as I've heard it helps the digestion to eat some light carbs. I had not fasted at all, but I probably should have, as it would have made the vomit less disgusting.

After maybe half an hour, things started! The onset was quite quick, the only time I've had it quicker was the first time, when I just downed 2 liters of 50g MHRB in water boiled for 15mins with lemon juice--but I would never stomach that again. Anyway, as usual I had about an hour or two of insane, random hypnagogic imagery (during this period, I always regret having done the aya). Then I felt my brain EXPLODING and I was being told that I had taken at least twice as much as I should have of the MHRB. The cure was to vomit up the excess (I never vomit when I don't take too much of it). I felt my brain being 'defragged' and 'reformatted' to get ready for ego death and entry into the other dimension. This is what always happens when I take a high dose, I always feel like I am literally going to die and there will be nothing left of my brain.

This was my second time with a very high-dose experience. It was, however, quite different from my first time. Still intensely visual and a sense that I was everywhere, but I think it was more mental and less visual than the first time. I felt sure this time that I could communicate with the dead (including my dad, Stalin, Hitler, Einstein, John Africa, etc.) and I was also remembering contact that I've had with ETs in real life. I finally understood that the ETs are neither good nor bad, but rather they are above good and bad. They do not understand those concepts like we do, which is why they scare us. I felt like the super-positioning in quantum mechanics now applied to concepts for me. Things were no longer either or, black or white, etc. I could understand that something could both be true and false, good and evil, here and not here, all at the same time. I understood that 'soul mates' do exist to various degrees, but that we often have more than one, and we may go between various soul mates in a lifetime. The ayahuasca was, as usual, giving me romance advice.

After the trip, I spoke with my roommates. I felt that if I looked into their pupils, I could see into their brains/souls. It was too much to handle. The waves of euphoria I felt were also too much to handle. I felt that I understood/appreciated my friends in ways that I never had before. Love was flowing out from me. I hugged them.

It seems that magical thinking has now taken hold of me more than after the first experience. I still have a bit of a filter on what I was told, but I am starting to believe, more and more, what I learn from ayahuasca (for example, even before ayahuasca, I sort of believed in the 'aliens are here' theory, but now I am more sure of it, like maybe 80% sure instead of 60% sure). I sort of really do believe I was communicating with dead people, especially my father. I'm not sure, but kind of sure. I would be more sure if they gave me some detailed info that I could use as proof, but it doesn't seem to work like that.

One provable effect, however, was that after the trip, for the next 24 hours, my working memory had shot up (I could do much better on the dual N-back test), my long term memory was more accessible than ever, and my humor was intensified. I was getting everyone laughing with my jokes, even at work, so it wasn't just an internal thing. I became acutely aware of the ignorance of those around me. Not just of the realm that I had visited, but the low overall functioning of their brains... since mine had just become about twice as powerful as normal. My curiosity also skyrocketed, and I felt that I wanted to learn everything there is to learn in the universe. All of these effects take place every time I do a good dose of aya.

My mom is concerned that I am doing this too much. My sister is also worried about me. Mainly because a friend of hers (a new mom) just died of a heroin overdose. I try to tell them that ayahuasca is done weekly (or biweekly?) by many people in the various churches. But to them, a drug is a drug. My mom actually wants to do it one day, but still she doesn't want me to do it as much as I do. It's odd, because I can't imagine doing it every week, yet somehow I think I have been doing that for the last month (though usually low dose)... I think I just love how it makes me love life and see things differently. I also feel that it is important to connect with the mystical reality on a consistent basis in order not to get stuck in this one. But that makes NO sense to someone who has never done this! It even makes no sense to me sometimes.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 88212
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 25
Published: Sep 28, 2021	Views: 667
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Huasca Combo (269), Tetrahydroharmine (473), Mimosa tenuiflora (74), Syrian Rue (45) : Alone (16), Combinations (3)