DOSE: T+ 0:00	2800 mg	oral	Pharms - Carisoprodol
T+ 0:30	1050 mg	oral	Pharms - Carisoprodol
T+ 1:00	1050 mg	oral	Pharms - Carisoprodol

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

Soma is a crazy, highly addictive drug for me. It’s almost killed me three different times and I still want to take it. Here is a detailing of the first time I overdosed on soma – this is the only time I overdosed that I have much of a memory of.

First off, I need to say that Soma causes me to black out NOT pass out. After taking a large dose I would feel high for approximately 20 minutes, then black out and not remember a thing. However, this isn’t to say that I wasn’t doing anything. I have been told that while blacked out on Soma I was up and around cooking or doing dishes albeit while stumbling and slurring my speech. I’ve held rather incoherent conversations with people while on Soma, I’ve ended up in other places on Soma without remembering anything about how I got there, what I did while I was there, etc. We’re talking HOURS passing by without a single memory of anything.

I had taken Soma for about 2 years for chronic pain without being addicted to it or abusing it. Then, my father passed away. That was it for me. I was depressed and hollow. I couldn’t sleep. That’s when I started to take increased amounts of Soma. At first it was to help me sleep, but as I started increasing my doses I started to notice how amazing it felt to take large amounts of Soma at once. I have a HIGH tolerance for everything from alcohol to pills, and I build up a tolerance fast. At first, 3 or 4 Soma would get me a nice, whole body high. I describe it as a “warm melt” of all of my extremities and an intense euphoria. The euphoria made all of my sadness over losing my dad disappear. I’m not sure if it’s the “warm melt” or the euphoria that kept me wanting more, I imagine that it’s the combination of the two. It’s a warm, soothing, sink into the couch feeling combined with an intense happiness and contentedness I’d never felt before or since. Whatever the reason, I couldn’t get enough.

Pretty soon, 4 wasn’t cutting it. We’re talking on Monday 4 would work, but Tuesday I had to take 5, and then an hour after taking 5 I’d take 2 more. This pattern of increase continued until I was taking 8, 350 mg tabs of Soma followed by 3 more after 30 minutes. The day that I overdosed I remember taking the 8, followed by the 3 and having lunch (yes, I was so caught up that in the middle of a weekday I was getting high at home)… After lunch I took 3 more… and that’s it. That’s all I remember. The following is what I’ve been told happened:

My mother who lives 3.5 hours away in another state called me on the phone. She said I was slurring my speech and that I was incoherent. She was too far away to help. She called a relative who sent her son over to take me to the ER. He came to my home and I was locked in my office. I remember locking the door after taking the final 3 pills. Not because I was trying to hurt myself or anything but because (and this is devastating and humiliating to admit) I am a stay at home mom and my 3 children were home with me. I knew I was going to get f’d up and didn’t want them to see me. My children are old enough that they would know something wasn’t right. They would get scared. THAT’S how dangerous this drug is. I wanted it badly enough that I took it at home, alone with no one to keep an eye on my three children. It’s the biggest regret of my life.

When the relative got to my house he had to break the door open because I was not responding to his calls. He found me on the floor, awake and conscious but somewhat catatonic. He was able to support my weight and help me walk through my house and out to his car. I was blacked out, I walked and don’t remember. I don’t remember driving to the hospital. I don’t remember arriving at the hospital. I don’t remember getting stabbed with IVs. Although I was awake through all of it, slurring my speech, protesting and arguing with nurses, I don’t remember a single, minute detail.

I woke up in the hospital the next day. My aunt had come and stayed with me throughout the night. My children were at a relative’s. My husband was working in another state and on his way home. He was very angry about what I had just done to not only myself, but more importantly what I had just put our children through. And he had every right to be angry. The hospital would not discharge me until I met with a psychologist from the state who had to interview me to determine whether or not I had tried to kill myself. I promised that was not the case, but I know she didn’t believe me. From the time I blacked out around 12:45 p.m. til the time I was released from the hospital a total of 28 hours had gone by. 28 hours that I have no recollection of.

Before the Doctor released me he said if my mom hadn’t just happened to call from 3.5 hours away, my children would have discovered their mother dead. My sweet, 10 yr old daughter and 2 little sons. I almost did that to them. I almost took their innocent, sweet childhoods away from them because of my selfishness and addiction. And this is why Soma is so dangerous: I overdosed 2 more times after that. I don’t remember anything about the other two times.

Soma sucked me in and if it weren’t for the fact that I can’t get it online or from my doctors anymore, I’d probably still take it. I’d like to think I’d be more careful, but I can’t say for sure that I would. I can say that if I were to get my hands on some again, I would end up dead.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 96129
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Jan 20, 2020	Views: 3,628
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Pharms - Carisoprodol (186) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Train Wrecks & Trip Disasters (7), Overdose (29), Addiction & Habituation (10), Alone (16)