Changed Attitude to Sex
MDMA (Ecstasy)
Citation: Respondent 19. "Changed Attitude to Sex: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp97013)". Erowid.org. Jul 23, 2012. erowid.org/exp/97013
DOSE: |
oral | MDMA | (pill / tablet) |
The reason this experience was so amazing for me was that before knowing these wonderful friends, I had been obsessed with pulling men and sleeping with them, which I now know was to prove to myself and to others that I was attractive, which I know is a very insecure way to behave and did my self esteem no good at all. That night was the first time I had gone out to a club with friends and not only not thought about sex all night, but come home and sat up talking - really talking about important things - all night with my boyfriend and not felt the need to 'give' him sex so that he would still like me.
We are still happily living together, and do a couple of pills when we go out (about twice a month) - but the E made us realise what each of us was like as a person, not just in terms of sex. It was great. I won't do it every day or even every weekend because I don't need to. It's enough to do it once every now and then, it seems to clear the head of all the necessary but boring day to day stuff and let two (or more) people communicate in the most direct way.
Also, we are four teenagers all living together, but we never have any arguments or rows because since taking a pill all together we saw each other totally stripped of images and quirks, and we know we can speak totally freely with each other.
I love it. I'll never stop doing it.
I [Nicholas Saunders] replied that its best to keep it for special occasions as the nice effects quickly wear off otherwise, and to make use of the experience to improve everyday life. She then added:
Part of the E experience is wanting who you're with to have a wicked time, so anything that makes people realise that you can take a pill and survive, as long as you know what you're doing and know the risks, is good.
However, I would like you to make it clear that I use ecstasy as a dance drug, not as an aphrodisiac or to have a bonding experience with a friend, although those are side effects I enjoy - I only take it when I go out to a club and the emotional stuff happens when we get home, during the 'chill-out' period.
Thanks for the advice too - I haven't noticed the effects or the duration becoming less and I've never, ever had a bad trip, I've never freaked out completely (short but minor panic attacks but never more than once on the same pill), although the comedowns now are worse than when I first started. Only that one thing worries me about Eing - that sooner or later it'll start becoming boring and then what'll I do? :)
PS: Tip for a good comedown: fall asleep...honest! if you don't take speed with it (as most of my mates do) you'll be so tired from clubbing that you'll sleep off the comedown and wake up fine.
- A seventeen year old girl living in London with three other teenagers
Exp Year: 1999 | ExpID: 97013 |
Gender: Female | |
Age at time of experience: 17 | |
Published: Jul 23, 2012 | Views: 6,191 |
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MDMA (3) : Relationships (44), Sex Discussion (14), Retrospective / Summary (11), First Times (2), Club / Bar (25) |
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