DOSE:

0.3 g

smoked

Salvia divinorum

(extract - 10x)

BODY WEIGHT:

62 kg

MrMindplays Salvia Notes 3

I wasn’t feeling content with my three trips I wrote about in 'Notes 2'. For the next couple days I read about other people’s experiences and tried to connect with them. Also I wasn’t remembering much about the trip themselves. Only a few certain moments and rather more about the moments that trips were disrupted by a noise coming from real world or me opening my eye for an instance.

I also didn’t have much intention to try it again any time soon since especially the transition to the altered state and returning back to reality itself was exhausting.

Today in the middle of the day I made my mind and decided to give it one more try. I had the remaining 0.3 gr of Salvia. I grabbed the pipe and took a long puff until all the salvia burnt up. I hold it as long as I could and exhaled. I laid down on the sofa. After like 5 seconds the transition started. The immense feeling of pressure, being pulled down/sucked in… This time the feeling started from my feet and spread to rest of my body and finally to my head. I started to feel like I’m rotating on an axis around my head (passing between my ears). Like my feet is going up and my head is going down up to the point that i was upside down floating in the air. The passing through the dense mass was less scary though it was still as forceful. Then I found myself in that pink/orange/yellow place. And bang!

Suddenly a huge feeling of familiarity hit me. I instantly remembered the place and the feeling of being there. I felt very familiar with it. I said this was the place I visited two days ago. Suddenly a lot of details from my previous trips that I forgot popped up in my mind. While all this was happening, my consciousness was sharper than my previous trips too.

I’m normally extremely skeptical about all this stuff (I’d still rather call all this as illusions of brain that are perhaps shaped around deep uneasy to reach memories) but I found myself constantly telling things like “This place really exists”, “I’ll tell people and they won’t believe” to myself during the trip. It is still surprising to me to recognize this altered state as a realm of it’s own that I recognized as a single/consistent whole instead of as a mess of weird psychedelic experiences.

Anyways, I found myself hung upside down on top of that place with the four yellow walls and an open ceiling (from my 3rd trip in 'MrMindplay's Salvia Notes 2'). I started to hear someone calling me down. I remember someone holding me from one of my legs then pulling me to a horizontal position where I faced down the ground and I could see things better. This time I only saw a single female that I felt very familiar with. She was close to one of the corners of the space. (The corner that shared one of the walls that was opposite to the one that had the opening to that bath like place mentioned in 'MrMindplay's Salvia Notes 2'). She was waiting there and calling me. The other being (which i didn’t recognize) kept holding my leg and started to drag me down to the place where the female was. At that moment with my clear consciousness I decided not to go further. I decided to remain as sharp as possible and got back to reality as fast as I can and document the feeling and thoughts which felt very intact. I opened my eyes, I saw the ceiling and curtains in my apartment. But that wasn’t a full transition back to reality. My eyes shut down again. As the unfamiliar person/being dragged my leg further down I got into a vertical position where my head was up. Then I felt my head touched that area where I had swept through to that place. I clearly started to feel that “being filtered/swept through a dense mass” sensation on my head. I heard her last time asking “Won’t you come?”, then more of my body got sucked into that dense mass, sweeping through back to real world. I opened my eyes. Saw my living room. Spent some effort to remain in real world for like 5-10 secs then suddenly I felt totally in control in real world. Then I urged to grab my notebook and wrote down all details while they were still clear in my mind.

Now, remembering more details from my trips in 'MrMindplay's Salvia Notes 2' and this one; feeling more familiar about the whole experience and feeling more comfortable with the transition feeling, I think I have a bit better perspective of the thing.

Right now in “real world” if I try to interpret the whole phenomena with some experience I gained, I wouldn’t call this a visit to an alternate reality, a proof of body/mind duality, or an afterlife although it feels something like that and I can see how such experiences could drag many minds to such conclusions with the aid of a little wishful thinking. I would rather say that those are like some illusions happening in your brain likely close to those occur in brain during an Out of Body Experience and perhaps Near Death Experience that seems to be triggered when brain loses sensory input form outside (like the way Ketamine works by essentially “cutting off” the brain from the body. With no external stimulation being delivered to the brain from the nervous system, perception increases to fill the gap left by the missing senses giving rise to a hallucinogenic state) although what Salvia Divinorum does in the brain is not as clear as Ketamine and it neither functions in the brain like any classic hallucinogens.

One thing I realized is that many things I experienced during the trip could possibly be explained or be related to very early memories including those that might have been recorded deep in the memory before the development of language so it’s almost impossible to reach to those memories using regular mechanisms. Like this “passing through/sweeping through a highly dense border”; the feeling of excessive velocity; being sucked to another reality; the fear of being stuck in the middle of transition… all sounds like a birth experience impressions to me. Me being upside down being held by legs, or having people’s hands on me to a point that it makes me feel uncomfortable… Also many other stuff in those trips reminded of me early childhood memories.

One could also interpret those beings calling them with unconditional love, holding them, guiding them etc. as the welcoming of people of a newborn. Even you can interpret those common NDE experiences of people passing through a tunnel, rapid movements towards a very bright light, unpleasant noises, etc. as a part of birth memories that are possibly recorded but can’t be accessed because the way they were encoded before the development of language and some other mechanisms in brain. Also probably birth is one of biggest traumas a human experiences in life so it’s likely that one wouldn’t try to reveal those memories while leading a normal life unless a case of another trauma ( like death) appears or strong hallucinogens mess the normal workings of one’s brain.

But beside all, during the trips I was totally convinced that what was happening there was all real no matter how clear my consciousness and awareness were and how skeptical I am in ‘real’ life. I clearly experienced the feeling of “there exists something else, something real and consistent that I should learn more about and tell people about it and they likely wouldn’t believe it”.

And while we learn more and more about how brain functions we still don’t know what is consciousness, how it works, and how it relates to the physical world; while each one of us experience and deliberate the reality through one. I wouldn’t be surprised if one day we’d learn that consciousness itself is an inherent quality of the universe from the tiniest particle to the whole.

Exp Year: 2012	ExpID: 97988
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Nov 10, 2020	Views: 561
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Salvia divinorum (44) : General (1), Alone (16)