DOSE:	repeated	smoked	Cannabis
	20 mg	insufflated	Methoxetamine

BODY WEIGHT:

158 lb

MXE First Time With Cannabis- Pretty Good

Some friends and I went to a chillwave concert recently. In preparation, we smoked some cannabis and a few of us consumed edibles, including myself. Before this MXE experience, my previous substance use includes: cannabis, mushrooms, a variety of opiate medications (Norcos, Percocets, Codeine, Tramadol), Xanax, LSD, salvia, and cocaine. I was in a neutral mindset and mood, however, I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for over 2 years at this point, with the past 6-8 months being much more mild than my lowest point. I still do get mildly depressive feelings pretty frequently.

I originally planned to attend the concert on only cannabis, however, things don't always go as planned. An hour into the concert, I was high off the cannabis and starting to feel a little upset, since I was feeling alienated by my group of friends, which may or may not have been influenced by cannabis. Since I wanted to be distracted from the moment, I texted my friend who I spoke to recently about trying MXE. He told me to come over immediately, since he was leaving his dorm. I decided to take a break and head to his place.

My friend weighed 20 mg of MXE for me and I inhaled the line, while I was still feeling the influence of cannabis. I was starting to feel some light effects by the time I returned to the venue. I saw two of my friends near the entrance and went back into the crowd with them. At this point, things got pretty interesting. A random spot on my right chest felt a little numb. Then I noticed my face numbed slightly. But the areas in my nasal cavity the MXE touched were numbed the most. My heartbeat went up a little, but I decided it was normal and kept headbobbing to the music. 20-40 minutes in, little by little I felt my awareness and consciousness feel less attached to what was physically happening around me. For example, I was in the middle of a crowd with people inches or less away from me, yet I didn't feel physically close to them or that general feeling I would get in the middle of a crowd of hundreds of people. My reflex reactions seemed fine, however, and I was able to give perfect attention to accommodating people around me were trying to move. The music playing was mostly instrumental and slow paced, as opposed to danced music, so I had the opportunity to be introspective. I closed my eyes and saw some mild closed eye visuals.

I began to think about my earlier emotions and what was bothering me. I decided not to think of the negative situation so much and just to think about random positive aspects of my life, as I've been practicing to do the past couple months to help myself feel better overall (which has been effective). This began a mental tug of war for a while between negative and positive thoughts in my mind, with positive thoughts winning over. I began to then pay attention to the music which I kind of forgot to listen to for a while. I focused on the bass vibrating through my body and the trippy synths, while I still had my eyes closed. I never tried ecstacy before, however I thought to myself this is probably what ecstacy might feel like. 60-90 minutes in, my body generally felt good, kind of like the feeling opiates gave me. My emotions at this point were good as well and my detachment was stronger than earlier. I felt like my vision became a bit more physically 'clear'. An analogy to this would be switching from one of those old boxy TV's to today's HDTVs. I noticed certain details better, but I felt like my color perception was becoming a bit more dark, like if someone put tint over my eyes.

After the concert roughly 2 and half to 3 hours after I took the MXE, I was still feeling the effects decently. I noticed I was physically numbed out a little. I asked my friend to pinch my arm. I felt the pain from the pinch a bit, but it didn't bother me. I still felt detached from my surroundings, but it was a good feeling at that point. By the time I got home 4-5 hours after taking the MXE, the effects weakened a little, but were still decent. I had 5 friends who were crashing in my room that night, but it didn't bother me like it would have if I were sober, because of the MXE's detaching and positive effects on my mind. On our way to the car, I began to feel alienated by my friends again and one of them could tell I wasn't feeling too good emotionally, so I told him I was having a bad trip and I felt like a bad person. He talked me out of it pretty quickly and I became okay again. When we got back to my place, I lay in bed for probably an hour before falling asleep. I was thinking about my life again, but this time I realized my friends still care about me and it was likely the cannabis and later MXE that made me really quiet, so of course I would feel 'alienated', because I'm not really talking. I fell asleep real well and woke up feeling great. I felt clear headed the following day, except for some memory slowness from the high consumption of cannabis the previous day.

I had a good impression with MXE and I hope to experiment with higher doses in the near future to explore its effects, particularly it's anti depressive effects a bit more.

Exp Year: 2013	ExpID: 99914
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Apr 2, 2020	Views: 958
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Methoxetamine (527) : Combinations (3), Difficult Experiences (5), Depression (15), First Times (2), Club / Bar (25)